Review of five perfume samples from eBay pot luck – part 2

This blog is part 2 of my testing out the assortment of perfume samples I got for £23.50 from eBay. My thoughts on the first few are here!

Emma's Favourite Songs, 2016.

Influences: Taylor Swift breakup songs, Quentin Tarantino movies, songs covered in Glee, tracks frequently used in Sky Sports football montages and basically anything I can turn my swag on conduct terrible karaoke to.

1. Homecoming (Kanye West ft. Chris Martin)
2. Son of a Preacher Man (Dusty Springfield)
3. Alison (Elvis Costello)
4. What Makes You Beautiful (One Direction)
5. Rocky Raccoon (The Beatles)
6. Hallelujah (Rufus Wainwright)
7. Sinnerman (Nina Simone)
8. I Knew You Were Trouble (Taylor Swift)
9. Sexy! No No No… (Girls Aloud)
10. Clam, Crab, Cockle, Cowrie (Joanna Newsom)
11. Off to the Races (Lana del Rey)
12. Fancy (Iggy Azalea ft. Charli XCX)
13. November Has Come (Gorillaz)
14. Samson (Regina Spektor)
15. Romeo and Juliet (Dire Straits)
16. Stuck in the Middle with You (Stealers Wheel)
17. Run this Town (Rihanna, Jay-Z and Kanye West)
18. Power (Kanye West)
19. Untouchable (Girls Aloud)
20. This is What Makes Us Girls (Lana del Rey)
21. Paper Planes (M.I.A.)
22. Talk Show Host (Radiohead)
23. Lullaby (Dixie Chicks)
24. All These Things that I've Done (The Killers)
25. Angie Baby (Helen Reddy)

26. 22 (Taylor Swift)
27. Wild Boys (Duran Duran)

28. Love the Way You Lie Part II (Rihanna ft. Eminem)
29. Head over Heels (Tears for Fears)
30. Boys Don't Cry (The Cure)
31. Problem (Ariana Grande ft. Iggy Azalea)
32. Good Old Fashioned Lover Boy (Queen)
33. We Are Never Getting Back Together (Taylor Swift)
34. Glory Box (Portishead)
35. Empire State of Mind: Broken Down (Alicia Keys)
36. How Do You Like Me Now? (The Heavy)
37. 2am (The Saturdays)
38. Adia (Sarah McLachlan)
39. Tiny Dancer (Elton John)
40. Baba O'Riley (The Who)
41. Wildwood Flower (June Carter Cash)
42. The Loving Kind (Girls Aloud)
43. California Dreamin' (The Mamas and the Papas)
44. Cat People (Putting Out Fire) (David Bowie)
45. Chelsea Dagger (The Fratellis)
46. My Father's Gun (Elton John)
47. What I Go to School for (Busted)
48. Bang Bang (Jessie J ft. Ariana Grande & Nicki Minaj)
49. When She Loved Me (Sarah McLachlan)
50. Royals (Lorde)

51. Cell Block Tango (Chicago OST)
52. Hey Jude (The Beatles)
53. Brandy Alexander (Feist)
54. Don't Stop Believin' (Journey)
55. Defying Gravity (Idina Menzel)
56. Sueños (Diego Torres)
57. Love Affair (Regina Spektor)
58. Video Games (Lana del Rey)
59. I Don't Want to Go to Chelsea (Elvis Costello)
60. Dragon Queen (Yeah Yeah Yeahs)
61. Under Pressure (Queen ft. David Bowie)
62. Brown Eyes (Lady Gaga)
63. See You Again (Wiz Khalifa ft. Charlie Puth)
64. It Wouldn’t Have Made Any Difference (Todd Rundgren)
65. Everybody Wants to Rule the World (Tears for Fears)
66. Underneath Your Clothes (Shakira)
67. Blank Space (Taylor Swift)
68. Travelin' Soldier (Dixie Chicks)
69. Numb Encore (Jay Z ft. Linkin Park)
70. Lovely Head (Goldfrapp)
71. Bad Girls (M.I.A.)
72. Fucking Problems (A$AP Rocky ft. 2 Chainz, Drake & Kendrick Lamar)
73. I Wish I Knew How it Feels to Be Free (Nina Simone)
74. Shout (Tears for Fears)
75. Good For You (Selena Gomez ft. A$AP Rocky)

76. She (Elvis Costello)
77. Vincent (Don McLean)
78. As Long as You Love Me (Justin Bieber ft. Big Sean)
79. Golden Slumbers (K.D. Lang)
80. Lullaby (The Cure)
81. Picture to Burn (Taylor Swift)
82. All Along the Watchtower (Devlin ft. Ed Sheeran)
83. Ay Vamos (J. Balvin)
84. Waka Waka (Shakira)
85. Pennies in my Pocket (Emilio Estefan)
86. Wonderwall (Oasis)
87. Airplanes part 2 (B.o.B, Hayley Williams & Eminem)
88. The River (Joni Mitchell)
89. Hey Mama (Kanye West)
90. 6 Inch (Beyonce ft. The Weeknd)
91. O Saya (A.R. Rahman ft. M.I.A)
92. Baby (Justin Bieber ft. Ludacris)
93. Take a Bow (Rihanna)
94. Work (Kelly Rowland)
95. Ignition (Remix) (R. Kelly)
96. Notorious (Duran Duran)
97. Call the Shots (Girls Aloud)
98. Shake it Off (Taylor Swift)
99. Let Me Love You (Ariana Grande ft. Lil’ Wayne)
100. White Horse (Taylor Swift)

Emsy's Favourite Songs, 2k15 edition

It starts with Kanye West, ends with Kanye West, and has everything from Taylor Swift, One Direction and Nina Simone in the middle.

1. Homecoming (Kanye West ft. Chris Martin)
2. Son of a Preacher Man (Dusty Springfield)
3. Alison (Elvis Costello)
4. What Makes You Beautiful (One Direction)
5. Rocky Raccoon (The Beatles)
6. Hallelujah (Rufus Wainwright)
7. Sinnerman (Nina Simone)
8. I Knew You Were Trouble (Taylor Swift)
9. Sexy! No No No… (Girls Aloud)
10. Clam, Crab, Cockle, Cowrie (Joanna Newsom)
11. Off to the Races (Lana del Rey)
12. Fancy (Iggy Azalea ft. Charli XCX)
13. November Has Come (Gorillaz)
14. Samson (Regina Spektor)
15. Romeo and Juliet (Dire Straits)
16. Run this Town (Rihanna, Jay-Z and Kanye West)
17. Power (Kanye West)
18. Untouchable (Girls Aloud)
19. This is What Makes Us Girls (Lana del Rey)
20. Paper Planes (M.I.A.)
21. Talk Show Host (Radiohead)
22. Lullaby (Dixie Chicks)
23. All These Things that I've Done (The Killers)
24. Angie Baby (Helen Reddy)
25. 22 (Taylor Swift)
26. Wild Boys (Duran Duran)
27. Love the Way You Lie Part II (Rihanna ft. Eminem)
28. Head over Heels (Tears for Fears)
29. Boys Don't Cry (The Cure)
30. One Thing (One Direction)
31. Good Old Fashioned Lover Boy (Queen)
32. Let it Go (Idina Menzel)
33. Problem (Ariana Grande ft. Iggy Azalea)
34. Glory Box (Portishead)
35. Hey Stephen (Taylor Swift)
36. Empire State of Mind: Broken Down (Alicia Keys)
37. 2am (The Saturdays)
38. Adia (Sarah McLachlan)
39. Tiny Dancer (Elton John)
40. Baba O'Riley (The Who)
41. Wildwood Flower (June Carter Cash)
42. The Loving Kind (Girls Aloud)
43. California Dreamin' (The Mamas and the Papas)
44. Chelsea Dagger (The Fratellis)
45. My Father's Gun (Elton John)
46. Riding in Cars with Boys (Lana del Rey)
47. Seasons of Love (Idina Menzel)
48. When She Loved Me (Sarah McLachlan)
49. Royals (Lorde)
50. Hey Jude (The Beatles)
51. Brandy Alexander (Feist)
52. Don't Stop Believin' (Journey)
53. Defying Gravity (Idina Menzel)
54. Love Affair (Regina Spektor)
55. Video Games (Lana del Rey)
56. I Don't Want to Go to Chelsea (Elvis Costello)
57. Dragon Queen (Yeah Yeah Yeahs)
58. Under Pressure (Queen ft. David Bowie)
59. Brown Eyes (Lady Gaga)
60. It Wouldn’t Have Made Any Difference (Todd Rundgren)
61. Everybody Wants to Rule the World (Tears for Fears)
62. Underneath Your Clothes (Shakira)
63. Beneath Your Beautiful (Labrinth ft. Emile Sande)
64. Breathe (Taylor Swift)
65. Travelin' Soldier (Dixie Chicks)
66. Numb Encore (Jay Z ft. Linkin Park)
67. Lovely Head (Goldfrapp)
68. I Wish I Knew How it Feels to Be Free (Nina Simone)
69. Shout (Tears for Fears)
70. She (Elvis Costello)
71. Vincent (Don McLean)
72. Golden Slumbers (K.D. Lang)
73. Lullaby (The Cure)
74. Love will Tear us Apart (Joy Division)
75. All Along the Watchtower (Devlin ft. Ed Sheeran)
76. While My Guitar Gently Weeps (The Beatles)
77. Pennies in my Pocket (Emilio Estefan)
78. Jackson (Johnny and June Carter Cash)
79. Wonderwall (Oasis)
80. Airplanes part 2 (B.o.B, Hayley Williams & Eminem)
81. The Killing Moon (Echo and the Bunnymen)
82. The River (Joni Mitchell)
83. Chasing Cars (Snow Patrol)
84. Hey Mama (Kanye West)
85. Braille (Regina Spektor)
86. Back to Black (Amy Winehouse)
87. O Saya (A.R. Rahman ft. M.I.A)
88. Baby (Justin Bieber ft. Ludacris)
89. Chillin' (WALE ft. Lady Gaga)
90. Take a Bow (Rihanna)
91. About the Boy (Little Mix)
92. Work (Kelly Rowland)
93. Ignition (Remix) (R. Kelly)
94. Breathe Me (Sia)
95. Strict Machine (Goldfrapp)
96. Notorious (Duran Duran)
97. Too Young (Phoenix)
98. Call the Shots (Girls Aloud)
99. Shake it Off (Taylor Swift)
100. Gold Digger (Kanye West ft. Jamie Foxx)

Album review: MIDNIGHT MEMORIES (One Direction)

(this review is of the Deluxe addition of Midnight Memories, which features three more songs than the standard version).

A year on from Take Me Home, the nation’s most lusted after boyband have gotten up to all manner of adventure, from Harry’s failed relationship with Taylor Swift irking her so much that she felt the need to blast him on various public occasions, to Zayn being accused of cheating on Little Mix’s Perrie, only to follow it up with a proposal, classic. 

The boys have shown they are now fully-fledged #adults by inking various parts of their body (even little Niall has a tattoo now!), and in between that, they’ve managed to star in a Morgan Spurlock documentary, and, oh yeah, make some music.

The album opens with the somewhat ambitiously titled Best Song Ever. It’s not quite that, but it’s a sufficiently cheerful pop number with a catch chorus, making it a shoo-in for playlists in upcoming Christmas parties (I’ve already heard it in upmarket bars!). Happily has a charming country music vibe to it, all strings, banjo, and feet-stamping. Perhaps I’m biased, but I really don’t see the criticism that the boys can’t sing, especially when their voices sound so strong on this track, all without an autotune in sight.

Story of My Life has deepness and maturity that we normally expect these five to eschew, featuring Zayn’s heartfelt delivery of “but baby, running after you is like chasing the clouds”, a gorgeous line of poetry that drives home the sad point that no matter how much you love someone, love alone may not be enough. Unfortunately, it was slightly let down by the Mumford and Sons-esque riff in the background, a band I associate with mawkishness. 

Don’t Forget Where You Belong channels Take That, in a good way, with a cheeky What Makes You Beautiful nod: “and the proof is in this song”. The refrain is absolutely swoon-worthy, exhibiting the vocal talents of the band’s two fittest members, Louis and Zayn (just dictatin’), who’s voices complement each other’s terrifically.

It doesn’t take Alfred Kinsey to work out that in the three years since the band’s inception, One Direction have racked up a few notches in their bedposts, and this worldliness comes across in their music, which is more adult, more self-assured. The album’s title track Midnight Memories serves up GQ-type swagger, boyband style. The line “5 foot something with the skinny jeans” hails 30H!3 Starstruck and its more lascivious “tight jeans, double DDs” with a sultry, rock-style, whilst teetering on the right side of naughty (“Same old shhhh but a different day”) such that pre-teens’ parents won’t refuse to buy the album. 

Little Black Dress, a throwback to vintage rock that Louis and Liam helped co-pen, simply exudes sex, and is all the better for it. And Alive, which casually glazes upon the topic of sex addiction, features angel-faced Niall reciting “I whisper something in her ear that I just can't repeat”, which is certainly something.

These days, it seems an album isn’t anything without a cheeky bit of dubstep on it, and the token dubstep track of Midnight Memories is Little White Lies, a song which addresses an issue that is under-represented in mainstream pop music by men: that woman want sex just as much as guys do. “I know you want it/ I know you feel it too/ Let's stop pretending/ That you don't know what I don't know/ Just what we came to do” they sing in two-beat, and because this is One Direction, the topic of female desire makes for jaunty music-making, whereas in the hands of Robin Thicke, it just sounds creepy. You see, presentation is everything.

With 18 songs, the law of averages would dictate that there will be some non-entities, and this album has (possibly more than) its share. Diana is filler song in motion, and the Tears for Fears vibes of Everyone Wants to Rule the World-sounding in the background cannot redeem the ambiguity with the lyrics “I don't think you even realize baby you'd be saving mine” with regards to whether the song is about Princess Diana puts it in the vaguely poor taste category. 

You and I isn’t as affecting or sweet as their other love songs, and “not even the gods above can separate the two of us” reminds me of the first song (can’t remember the name) on Miley Cyrus’ Bangerz album. It’s never good when a song reminds you of Miley Cyrus, just truthin’. And Strong is a tad corny for me, whilst Does He Know is forgettable, and two of the few songs I would angle the “all One Direction songs sound the same” criticism at. And whilst Midnight Memories had a tolerable amount of Mumford and Sons similarity, Something Great sounded too much like M&F than I felt permissible.

Where I complimented the lads on their braveness to try their hand at falsetto in the Take Me Home album, they clearly had fun doing so, because there’s some more on Right Now, with Zayn pushing his vocal range at “You know I can't fight the feeling” like a pro. 

The final song of the deluxe edition, Half a Heart, seems a gloomy tone to depart on, but what it lacks in happiness it makes up for in pure emotion, with Zayn belting “I'm half a man- at best / With half an arrow in my chest/I miss everything we do/ I'm half a heart without you”. It really is true what they say; an artist has to suffer to produce true art, and in the same way, it helps, as a someone appreciating the work if you’ve suffered the pangs of disappointed love, because the lyrics of Half a Heart really resonated. And it seems quite apt that the legendary Casanova of 1D, Harry, ends the song, and the album, with the last sad word.

Persevere with Midnight Memories. Sticking two filler songs within the first five tracks of the album wasn’t too shrewd, but there is quality on it, not to mention some emotional lyrics that render some of the songs almost as layered as an onion. 

That being said, I don’t think it surpasses Take Me Home. It ends with less of a bang, and whereas even the filler songs of Take Me Home survived the repeat listening test (I’ve since completely altered my view of Heart Attack, which I’ve decided is brilliant), I imagine you’d have to pay me to re-listen to some of the duds on this album again. However, it’s still better than 99% of the crap that’s out in the music industry, and once again, exhibits that One Direction are so much more than just five pretty faces.

Grade: A-

Crush list, 2.0.

I like to make these random lists, as it's just an excuse to trawl the interwebz for eye candy :3

10. Eden Hazard (footballer, Belgium & Chelsea)

Last Wednesday, Hazard received his first sending off as a professional footballer for kicking 17-year-old Swansea ballboy. "It's child abuse!" cried the puritanical British media. They were conveniently forgetting a few things: 1) Charlie Morgan is 17, a spoilt rich kid who needed putting in his place and had I been Hazard, and 2) replays show that Hazard got the ball, not the rotund boy. But hey, don't let fachts get in the way of some good old fashioned Chelsea slating. 

Anyway, I'm proud of Hazard and that little blot on his otherwise impeccable copybook (he had only received one yellow as a Chelsea player thus far) actually endears the silky Belgian to me more now; he's got #ChelseaDNA.

09. Joe Hart (footballer, England & Manchester City)

No one near the goalpost have swagger like Joe! Mr. Hart has had a somewhat hit-and-miss season so far, especially compared to the high standard he set for himself last season, where his heroics helped Manchester City win the Title, and his attitude at times has led to some to deem him arrogant. But I like that cockiness that Hart has, (if you're that tall, that blonde, chew gum that coolly, in my opinion, you're entitled to some arrogance), and he is at the pinnacle of his fineness when he's laying his big goalkeeping hands on his teammates David Silva, Mario Balotelli, or best of all, Vincent Kompany, his captain. Bonus points: his surname is the shape of sunglasses which I do so love to wear.

08. Harry Styles (singer, One Direction)

Harry Styles, with his cheeky grin and Lolitaesque taste in older ladies, is not to everyone's taste, but I'm extremely fond of him. I also (and this might be delusion) - think he contributes hugely to One Direction's charisma appeal - witness his delivery of "shot me outta the sky, you're my Kryptonite" in One Thing. He should know.

07. Robert Sheehan (actor)

I always found Rob a little annoying in The Misfits, although that wasn't so much his acting as the character he was playing. But in Me & Mrs. Jones, a naff but endearing BBC comedy sitcom, he played a sweet lad, and in doing so, looked so, so much hotter. Plus he walked around in nothing but a towel for quite a few scenes; can't say I complained.

06. Rupert Grint (actor)

Yes, I know Harry Potter is over. I know that. But Grinty will always have a place in my heart. Of the three leads, he is the one who, in the films, I thought was the closest performance to how I imagined the character in the books, and he gave the films a much needed comic relief, particularly when things got super-dark in the latter films. Rupert Grint will always by my favourite ginger.

05. Jamie Redknapp (pundit)

Okay, okay. Redknapp Jr ain't the brightest apple in the tree his football knowledge is shown up on more than one occasion per match, which is pretty embarrassing (although I maintain that Jamie knows more about football than 99% of the football writers of The Guardian trolololololo). But who can say no to those dreamy hazel eyes, sexy stubble and irresistable smile? On more than one occasion when in Marks and Spencer I've wandered over to the cardboard cutout of him and just not moved. :3

04. Zayn Malik (singer, One Direction)

Poor timing, this, as Zayn has just been caught being a love rat, cheating on his girlfriend, a member of Little Mix. But hey, I'm not marrying him. I just like to look. And in his Bambi eyelashes and flawless skin & bone structure, there's a lot to enjoy. Plus his singing has come along a lot in the latest One Direction album - hear the way he belts out "and giiiiiiiirl, you and I, we're bout to make some memories tonight." Who says One Direction can't sing? Eh? EH??!?!??!?!

03. Gary Cahill (footballer, England & Chelsea)

It's with some sheepishness that I have Gaz on here as, when he first joined Chelsea, I was more than a little sniffy about him, not deeming him good enough. But our shy Yorkshireman has more than proved me wrong, blossoming into quite the JT 2.0, and playing wonderfully in the CL final when he was still nursing a hamstring injury (as did David Luiz). Anyway, Gazatron's arms are a work of art, as are his abs and all-round 6'3'' physique. We can even allow his less-than-manly act of getting his teeth whitened. After all, 50 Shades of Gary is our future captain. Ohhhh, Gary. #trollface

02. Louis Tomlinson (singer, One Direction)

I know Louis can't sing. And, unlike Harry, Liam and Niall, doesn't seem to have all that much personality either. But he is still my favourite member of One Direction by quite some distance, especially when he's strutting around in a pair of beige chinos and wearing a T-shirt that brings out his unusual eye colour. What can I say? He's got that One Thing :3

01. Peter Crouch (footballer, England & Stoke City)

Always. He may not be as amazing as he once was, scoring hat-tricks against Arsenal and bicycle kicks as a Liverpool player,  and the winning goal that propelled Tottenham into the CL, but his fabulous sense of humour, easygoing spirit and triffic personality will always render him: my Crouchiebung <333>

Emsy's November Playlist.

Otis (Kanye West ft Jay-Z)

Something that both Kanye and Jay-Z do very well indeed is big themselves up. It’s for this reason that they rub quite a few people up the wrong way, but as I’m someone whose head is so massively over-inflated that it’s a surprise I can fit it through corridors, I love how much they love themselves. And when you have this much swag, why shouldn’t you rate yourself a little bit? 

This song is a massive backpat; Kanye bigging himself up (“I made Jesus Walks so I’m never going to hell”), Jay-Z bigging himself up (“Or the big face Rollie I got two of those”) and both stroking each other’s egos as well. It would irk a lot of people, but the sampling of Otis Redding's Try a little Tenderness is probably one of the finest usages of sampling another song Kanye West has done, second only to the usage of Ray Charles’ I Got a Woman in Goldigga. 

Some of the wordplay really clicks, “Sophisticated ignorance, write my curses in cursive” and my favourite big-headed line of them all: “Photoshoot fresh, looking like wealth, I’m about to pull the paparazzi on myself”. Ah, how the other half do live.

Favourite One Direction Lines

Yes, I am a little bit obsessed. Some of these are for the poetic value of the lyrics, or the way the boys sing them (such as the way Zayn belts out #8).

01. “Shot me outta the Sky, you’re my Kryptonite” – One Thing (Harry)

02. “The way that you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed” – What Makes You Beautiful (all)

03. “It hurts me to think that you never cried” – Stand Up (Niall)

04. “I lie awake just to convince myself this wasn’t just a dream” – I Should’ve Kissed You (Liam)

05. "I'm blinded 'cause you are everything I see" – More than This (Liam)

06. “I hear the beat of my heart getting louder whenever I’m near you” – I Wish (Harry)

07. “And if we get together, yeah get together, don’t let the pictures leave your phone” – Live While We’re Young (Zayn)

08. “And giiiiiiiiiiiiiiiirl, you and I, we’re ’bout to make some memories tonight” - Live While We’re Young (Zayn)

09. “So come one, you got it wrong, to prove I’m right I put it in a sooooooooong” – What Makes You Beautiful (Zayn)

10. “I would walk through the desert, I would walk down the aisle, I would swim all the oceans, just to see you smile” – Stand Up (Liam)

11. "I used to think that I was better alone / why did I ever wanna let you go?" - Rock Me (Louis)

12. “Get out, get out, get outta my head, and fall into my arms instead” – One Thing (all)

13. “It feels like I’m constantly playing a game that I’m destined to lose” – I Would (Louis)

14. “I’ve tried playing it cool, but when I’m looking at you, I can’t ever be brave, cos you make my heart race” – One Thing (Liam)

15. “Now I’m climbing the walls, but you don’t even notice at all, that I’m going outta my mind, all day and all night” – One Thing (Niall)

16. “When he lays you down I might just die inside” – More than This (Harry)

17. “I see you every time I close my eyes, what am I gonna do” – I Should’ve Kissed You (Liam)

18. “Then I see you on the street, in his arms I get weak” – More than This (Louis)

19. “It took a minute, girl, to steal my heart tonight” – Stole My Heart (Harry)

20. “There is no place I’d rather be than right here with you tonight” - Stole My Heart (Zayn)

Album Review: TAKE ME HOME (One Direction)

The dreamy boy band’s second album had a difficult job, having to follow up to last year’s Up All Night, which featured the massively popular One Thing, Gotta Be You, and especially What Makes You Beautiful which was one of the tunes selected to be sung in the Olympics closing ceremony. The sequel, however, more than lives up to billing, The Godfather Part II of albums, if you will. 

There isn’t a song on it that stands out quite as much as What Makes You Beautiful did, but the overall quality is much greater.

The opening track, Live While We’re Young, an ode to living for the moment and YOLO-ing it up, is the closest to being the WMYB of the album, filled with up-tempo beats and cheeky one liners (“and if you get together, get together, don’t let the pictures leave your phone.”) Even the chorus, “let’s go crazy crazy crazy ‘til we see the sun”, you can imagine singing in a manner identical to the chorus to WMYB, and Zayn delivers some powerhouse at the refrain of “And giiiiiiirl, you and I, we’re about to make some memories tonight”; Mr Malik, in my opinion, is the one who has come the furthest, vocally, between the first and second albums.

To prove I’m right, I put it in a song.

Every August, Bung lists her top 100 or so songs, every year, there’s some good, some bad, some ugly (mostly ugly). Every year, she remains staunchly faithful to her Kanyes, her Rihannas and her Nina Simones, whilst bunging in some new tunes she’s become with over the past year (this year’s: One Direction & Lana, obviously). Every year, the people reading the list shake the head and think “oh dearrrrr.” And repeat.

1. Homecoming (Kanye West ft. Chris Martin)
2. Son of a Preacher Man (Dusty Springfield)
3. Angie Baby (Helen Reddy)
4. Rocky Raccoon (The Beatles)
5. Hallelujah (Rufus Wainwright)
6. Alison (Elvis Costello)
7. Sinnerman (Nina Simone)
8. What Makes You Beautiful (One Direction)
9. Sexy! No No No… (Girls Aloud)
10. Clam, Crab, Cockle, Cowrie (Joanna Newsom)
11. Paper Planes (M.I.A.)
12. Off to the Races (Lana del Rey)
13. November Has Come (Gorillaz)
14. Samson (Regina Spektor)
15. Adia (Sarah McLachlan)
16. Run this Town (Rihanna, Jay-Z and Kanye West)
17. Power (Kanye West)
18. Untouchable (Girls Aloud)
19. This is What Makes Us Girls (Lana del Rey)
20. Talk Show Host (Radiohead)
21. Lullaby (Dixie Chicks)
22. All These Things that I've Done (The Killers)
23. Charmaine (Plan B)
24. Love the Way You Lie Part II (Rihanna ft. Eminem)
25. Romeo and Juliet (Dire Straits)

26. Head over Heels (Tears for Fears)
27. Boys Don't Cry (The Cure)
28. One Thing (One Direction)
29. Good Old Fashioned Lover Boy (Queen)
30. Defying Gravity (Idina Menzel)
31. Work (Kelly Rowland)
32. Glory Box (Portishead)
33. Hey Stephen (Taylor Swift)
34. Empire State of Mind: Broken Down (Alicia Keys)
35. 2am (The Saturdays)
36. Fix Up Look Sharp (Dizzee Rascal)
37. Tiny Dancer (Elton John)
38. Baba O'Riley (The Who)
39. Wildwood Flower (June Carter Cash)
40. My Love (Sia)
41. The Loving Kind (Girls Aloud)
42. California Dreamin' (The Mamas and the Papas)
43. Chelsea Dagger (The Fratellis)
44. My Father's Gun (Elton John)
45. Riding in Cars with Boys (Lana del Rey)
46. Seasons of Love (Idina Menzel)
47. What’s My Name? (Rihanna ft Drake)
48. Hey Jude (The Beatles)
49. Brandy Alexander (Feist)
50. Don't Stop Believin' (Journey)

51. Love Affair (Regina Spektor)
52. Video Games (Lana del Rey)
53. I Don't Want to Go to Chelsea (Elvis Costello)
54. Dragon Queen (Yeah Yeah Yeahs)
55. Under Pressure (Queen ft David Bowie)
56. Brown Eyes (Lady Gaga)
57. It Wouldn’t Have Made Any Difference (Todd Rundgren)
58. Clothes Off! (Gym Class Heroes)
59. Everybody Wants to Rule the World (Tears for Fears)
60. Underneath Your Clothes (Shakira)
61. Breathe (Taylor Swift)
62. Travelin' Soldier (Dixie Chicks)
63. Jesus Walks (Kanye West)
64. Numb Encore (Jay Z ft. Linkin Park)
65. Lovely Head (Goldfrapp)
66. I Wish I Knew How it Feels to Be Free (Nina Simone)
67. Shout (Tears for Fears)
68. She (Elvis Costello)
69. Rio (Duran Duran)
70. Vincent (Don McLean)
71. Love will Tear us Apart (Joy Division)
72. Lullaby (The Cure)
73. While My Guitar Gently Weeps (The Beatles)
74. Sunshowers (M.I.A.)
75. Pennies in my Pocket (Emilio Estefan)

76. Jackson (Johnny and June Carter Cash)
77. Wonderwall (Oasis)
78. Stand Up (One Direction)
79. Airplanes part 2 (B.o.B, Hayley Williams & Eminem)
80. The Killing Moon (Echo and the Bunnymen)
81. Momentum (Aimee Mann)
82. The River (Joni Mitchell)
83. Golden Slumbers (K.D. Lang)
84. Hey Mama (Kanye West)
85. Braille (Regina Spektor)
86. Back to Black (Amy Winehouse)
87. O Saya (A.R. Rahman ft. M.I.A)
88. Baby (Justin Bieber ft Ludacris)
89. Work it (Missy Elliot)
90. Chillin' (WALE ft Lady Gaga)
91. Take a Bow (Rihanna)
92. Lean on Me (Bill Withers)
93. Ignition (Remix) (R. Kelly)
94. Machine Gun (Portishead)
95. Strict Machine (Goldfrapp)
96. Notorious (Duran Duran)
97. Too Young (Phoenix)
98. No More (3LW)
99. Call the Shots (Girls Aloud)
100. She Said (Plan B)

TV recap: THE APPRENTICE series 8 episode 1, BLANK CANVAS

“In business, times are tough. Investment, hard to come by” is the ominous voiceover, as we enter the new series of The Apprentice. True to form, the show kickstarts by showing us footage of some arrogant idiots taking absolute guff, “I will literally roar my way to the top”, brags one lady, as a guy brags “I have a habit for pulling people’s strings and making them do what I want.” 

Baby if you love me, take me to the gas station.

Alright, obligatory list is bloody obligatory. Bung's Crushes of 2012. Then I'll come back at the end of the year and cringe at my terribad taste. ;)

10. Frank Lampard

The one, the only. The man who is a strong contender for my favourite player of all time, just so happens to be one of the most handsome. His distinctive, gorgeous green-blue eyes is just one of the many things that I love about him second only to his countless goals for Chelsea. (Bonus swoon factor: Scotty Parker ain't looking too bad in this gif, either.)

09. Harry Styles

Not sure that I'm actually allowed to fancy this boy seeing as I'm not twelve years old, but oh well, the heart wants what it wants. One flash of Styles' cheeky-chappy grin and my knees go weak. HELLO SAILOR.

08. Joe Hart

Nobody, but nobody, chews gum with more swagger than Joseph Hart. England's Number 1 is also a damn good goalkeeper, and the amount of shameless PDA he has with his City captain Vincent Kompany only goes to boost the beautiful, blonde-haired, blue-eyed lad's appeal. Don't ever stop, boys!

07. Rupert Grint

Mr Grint is pretty much guaranteed tenure on this top 10 list, on the basis that I touched his hand when he was at the Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows part 2 premiere in Leicester Square, haha. But how can you not love a bit of Rupert Grint? Those wide blue eyes, the striking red hair, and best of all, the fact that he seems like a total laugh to hang out with. Love. <3

06. Jamie Redknapp

Mr M&S needs to train not to make such duff adverts, to drop the fake London accent and not to say embarrassing things on Sky (he thought Suarez was right not to shake Evra's hand, lolwut), and is probably too stupid to ever tax evade, but, unf. Those cheekbones, those eyes, not to mention that nobody, but nobody, werqs a suit better than Jimmy Redknapp. So after everything I just said, he literally doesn't need to train. Wheyyyy.

05. Zayn Malik

The second One Direction member on this list, and not the last either. I regret nothing. One Direction may not have anything new to contribute  to the music industry (although What Makes you Beautiful is a delightfully simple ditty), but the fact that they have three of the most beautiful men on the planet in their group more than makes up for it. Honestly, Zayn's face... *swoon*

04. Ryan Gosling

The Gosling bug hit me when I was watching The Ides of March. I still maintain that he's an older, American, more talented version of Tom Felton, something that absolutely nobody agrees with. But let's just agree that he's an exceptionally versatile and talented actor, who is so very, very fine.

03. Louis Tomlinson (second from the right)

Um, yeah, Louis. *swoons* There are a lot of hot boys in 1D, but the thing about this boy that pushes my buttons even more than Harry and Zayn is the boy-next-door look he sports. In fact, whenever I look at Louis, I see the fact of this boy who I once *adored*. Now, me likening the two of them is probably delusion but there you go. Anyway. Louis.

02. Jose Mourinho

When Jose and Chelsea parted after a spat too many with RA, I won't lie to you, it was like a divorce. I couldn't think about anything our special one. And make no mistake, he is still special. AVB came along and he did an admirable imitation, but he could never quite fill Jose's shoes; the original Special One will always be the blueprint. Haughty, self-serving, Machiavellian, and prone to chatting B/S on more than one occasion, but so, so entertaing with it. A bit craggy now compared to his fine-as-fuq Chelseabung does, but, you still would.

01. Peter Crouch

CROUCHIEBUNG. *____* Between my first getting a crush on him in 2006, so much as gone on and changed in my life, but my devotion to the 6'7" giant has remained constant. I just love the sight of Crouchie smiling, and hope, more than anything, that this loveable sweetheart can come to the Euros this year. Crouchie, to quote Shakira, Tu más que nadie merece ser feliz

And that's that! Ladies tomorrow. :DDDD

You've got a smile that could light up this whole town.

I've been revisiting the Taylor Swift tracks on my iPod recently, and I don't care what anyone else says, I still find her songs a delight. One lyric in her "You Belong with Me" song, particularly rings out to me, I find it charming in its corniness, you've got a smile that could light up this whole town. And it got me thinking, several of my favourite celebrities genuinely do have smiles so fabulous they could metaphorically light up a town. Here be a few of my favourites!

06. Adam Johnson



There are plenty of footballers whom I fancy more than AJ, but his smile, but the unadulterated joy radiating from the half moon on his face is just a joy to behold. Adorable!

05. Selena Gomez




Her cheeks are absolutely gorgeous and I love how easily her lovely smiles come. Her hair, a cascade of curls also frame her face perfectly and the endless supply of lipgloss she has only makes her smiles lovelier.

04. Mila Kunis



The cheekiness that comes with her grins adds to their awesome, and she has the largest, most unforgettable eyes ever.

03. Harry Styles

This boy most certainly does know he's beautiful, but I don't even care. He's a jack the lad, but so, so, hot with it. And that cheeky grin, goddamn.

02. Hailee Steinfeld

This gif of Hailee giggling is one of my all-time favourites. Her effortless charm and unpretentious, natural happiness is completely infectious. I adore her!

01. Dianna Agron
Oh, she is divine. The combination of Lolita lips, exquisitely unusual eye colour and long eyelashes, as well as her flawless skin and bone structure, make for the most beautiful smile I have ever seen, bar none.


How lovely! *___*