Red Sparrow's 15 Rating Should Never Really Have Been Here

The only positive thing I can say about Red Sparrow is that Charlotte Rampling and Jeremy Irons were in. Although, after this, Batman v Superman and High-Rise, Jezza might want to find himself a new agent...

I watched Red Sparrow on Thursday (don't worry, I used my Limitless card to book a ticket to Kenneth Branagh's vanity project so I didn't contribute to JLaw's Box Office, then sneaked in). It was, as I expected, dreadful. After Passengers and mother!, I daresay a film this bad is the last thing Jennifer Lawrence needs, but there you go.

Best and Worst Dressed of the Oscars, 2018.

Obviously, fashion and looks are subjective, so this is by no means the gospel. And I'm not even gonna pretend that bias and love for certain performers (and disdain for others) did not creep until my rankings. I'm prone to playing favourites and being hella petty to those I dislike a la Miles Teller when he tweeted 'congratulations to Moonlight!'

The Dunkirk twinks Harry Styles and Fionn Whitehead weren't invited to the Oscars, but had they been, I'm sure they would have made the Best Dressed Males List.

So, without further ado...

Best dressed women

07. Beanie Feldstein

Jonah Hill's younger sister's dress reminds me, funnily enough, of Jonah's Superbad co-star Emma Stone's gorgeous City of Stars dress that she wore to the 2017 Golden Globes. Only a darker, more gothic version. Black is a slimming colour, and the winged eye make-up, wavy hair and dangly earrings complete the outfit nicely.

Oscars Not Bad

The acting class of 2018 including two sparring partners Outside Ebbing, Missouri. The most predictable batch of winners in recent years, but hey, no Casey Affleck or Emma Stone in sight, so not as objectionable as last year!

Hot dang! I should have put a bet down yesterday, because, bar the short film categories, I got every feature length film category bang on! Ohai, sick predictions! This is by far the best showing I’ve had since creating this blog at the age of 15, and, I have to say, it feels pretty satisfying!

Oscar predictions, 2018

Sick Oscar graphic credit: Vulture. Guess the films represented!

The Times' review of RED SPARROW (Francis Lawrence, 2018)

Kevin Maher of The Times wrote a fantastically scathing review of the mess that was mother!. He's on form again, slating Jennifer Lawrence's new film, Red Sparrow. I've taken the liberty of photographing it, as The Times reviews are behind a paywall.

Click to enlarge to read all the shade!

U-rated films with the longest (or most eye-catching) BBFC short insights

Unlike the MPAA rating ‘G’ which is almost becoming obsolete these days (even My Little Pony: The Movie got a PG in America) the BBFC does not require a film to be squeaky clean in order to get a U-rating (ditto Ireland and their equivalent to the U, G).

The guidelines at U allow for more in the way of comic violence, threat, very elementary sexual innuendo (eg flirting) and mature themes than the Americans. (Case in point: Inside Out, Finding Dory and Love and Friendship were all U/G here and in Ireland, yet received a PG in America.)

When I was wondering around WHSmith and Tesco, I noticed a few DVDs which really testify to this fact, from the sheer length of their short insights (in case you hadn’t realised, turning over DVD cases and reading the back is one of my favourite pastimes *James Franco in The Disaster Artist-style awkward laugh*).

The Angry Birds Movie, which was cut to get a U-rating (read about why here), is the longest with four issues at U: