Film review: HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL 3 [sarcasm alert haha]

At the time of writing this, High School Musical 3: Senior Year has an extremely lowly rating of 3.3/10 on IMDb. This saddens me greatly. My friend Luke and I watched HSM3 this Wednesday, due to it being 3.30 and W. not starting until 5.30, and HSM3 starting at 3.45pm. I’m delighted that we made this choice, because it proved to be everything that cinema isn’t these days – intelligent, moving, witty, and so, so, well acted.

Troy and Gabriella are now in their final year of high school, and they still haven’t bunged. In fact, it takes them 90 whole minutes of celluloid to even have a kiss. And even then it’s not a proper kiss. Anyway, it’s time to go to college. Troy’s dad wants him to pursue his basketball, and Gabriella’s doing Law somewhere far away. Naturally, they have preoccupations over whether or not their oh-so-deep relationship will stand this trying test, but it’s nothing the odd song or two can’t sing. In fact, Gabriella even decides it would be a cool thing to – on top of all the exams they have – put on one last school musical.

Meanwhile, Sharpay’s gotten herself a Machiavellian British little manservant, her camp brother Ryan’s trying to prove to the world that he’s not really gay by winking at the girl that plays the piano, and Troy’s basketball buddy Chad is gonna miss his mate. Oh the woes.

Despite the achingly fresh and original storyline, HSM3 still stays true to its bubblegum roots, wherein all the characters will be break into song whenever they damn well please – whether that be in asking a girl to prom, in the middle of a basketball game, or, best of all – in a deserted garage, where the scene between Troy and Chad is bromancetastic.

Vanessa Hudgens deserves an Oscar for her heart-wrenching performance of the teenage girl who is torn between her loves – her education, and her stunning, not at all impotent boyfriend, although this really is a group effort, with the entire cast not putting a foot wrong throughout the entire film.

If you do not cry at the scene in which Troy finds Gabriella and they have their private prom moment, then I tell you, you have no heart. Everything in HSM3 has been building up to this moment, which is in itself a terrifically post-modern homage to Shakespearean courtly scenes. Everything about this film is perfect, and I so wish that I could sing like Ashley Tisdale.

(Nah, seriously, I liked it quite a bit – 7/10. It was totally shit of course, but ya know, in a good way. It was much funnier than Burn After Reading, at any rate. The gospel version of “We’re All in this Together” was good fun.)