Second-guessing which films got the BBFC the most complaints in 2019

This blog is rated 15 for strong sex references and descriptions of violence.

After years of releasing their annual reports every July, 2018's BBFC annual report was instead released in late May. As I really love testing my BBFC senses on a yearly basis, to see how good I am at reading the general public's perception of what BBFC ratings for films ought to be, I thought I'd guess which films got them the most complaints in 2019!

Note, when I refer to a '2019 release', this actually means any film that came out in cinemas in the UK in 2019. So The Favourite, although a 2018 film by American release dates (and eligible for the 2019 Oscars and BAFTAs for that precise reason), didn't hit UK cinemas until January 2019, and is thus a 'UK 2019 release'. 

My guesses:

01. Joker

10 Finest Fellas in a 2010 Film

Happy Hump Day! 2011's list, if you were bored.

10. Ken Watanabe, Inception

10 Hottest Men in Film, 2013.

Happy Hump Day! I've been a bit lax with these lists of late, but, as we're entering the Christmas period, I thought I'd revisit these list series, to raise the temperature a bit!

The female version of the 2013 list is here!

10. Leonardo DiCaprio, The Great Gatsby

Second Guessing the Most Complaints the BBFC Got in 2016

The BBFC’s 2016 Annual Report is set to be dropped any day now (2015's one came out late June last year), and for me, it’s basically like waiting for Christmas. Of course I’ll do an extensive coverage of the Report when it comes out, as I did with the 2015 one, but for now, I thought I’d guess which films the BBFC got the most complaints about.

Note that these are my predictions for public feedback, not my own thoughts about the BBFC’s performance in 2016, which I have outlined in this blog post already.

01. 10 Cloverfield Lane (12A, people will say it should have been a 15)

BAFTA predictions.

I'm seeing Fences later, and then immediately after the winners of the BAFTAs will be available online. I will have to avoid the internet for 2 hours until 9pm so I can watch them 'live' on the BBC and check how I fared in my predictions, swoon at the fit celebrities and their wardrobe and bask in the general movie love!

Even though I expect La La Land to sweep comfortably tonight, a film I am very 'meh' about, I'm still looking forward to the BAFTAs tonight; following movie awards in the 2006 season and rooting for Brokeback Mountain was the reason I started this blog, after all. 

I heard on the grapevine that Isabelle Huppert (who wasn't nominated for Elle, which was ineligible due to British release dates, but was eligible but not nominated for Things to Come) will be presenting Best Actress. That is some very cheeky/brazen campaigning from Sony, worthy of the character Michèle Leblanc! If Leonardo DiCaprio or Felicia Vikander had pulled such a move last year, I would have cringed at dat thirst, but as it's La Reine Isabelle, I dig her audacity.

So, without further ado, the predictions!

Were the identities of the presenters of Best Actor & Actress at the SAGs yesterday a tell?

I got three out of five on my SAG predictions, which isn't very good. I should have predicted Denzel, given SAG have never awarded him, and they must have been keen to set that right. However, I am delighted I got that wrong, because I don't want to see Creepy Affleck run away with the award.

Given Brie Larson's rightly frosty response at the Golden Globes when she had to read Affleck's name out and hand him the trophy, I was wondering if the mere fact that she even bothered to show up at the SAGs to honour her presenting duties (as with the Golden Globes and Oscars, last year's winner of Best Actress presents the award to Best Actor) was a slight giveaway as to the recipient of the award. I'm guessing that she didn't want to show up, knowing she'd probably have to present to The Perv, but then SAG told her that she needn't worry, because it wasn't going to The Perv, but a talented, humble, amazing actor instead, and thus, Brie showed up after all?

Leonardo DiCaprio's capital in Hollywood is higher than Brie Larson's, so he can afford to Bye Felicia these events if all he's doing is reading out the name of someone and handing them a blue statue. SAG's interesting choice for his replacement, his Wolf of Wall Street co-star Jonah Hill, also got me thinking if JH knew in advance who the winner was.

(Speaking of Jonah and SAG, remember when he took the SAG minimum wage of $60,000 for WoWS, just so he could work with Marty? I also love how he deputised for Leo at the SAGs like Donnie was Jordan's de facto stand-in in the film XD)

Jonah Hill starred opposite Emma Stone in her first film role, Superbad, where she played the object of his affections, and their reunion yesterday when he announced her name was totally adorable. He looked ecstatic for her, and the way he screamed 'Emma Stone La La Land' when he read it out was freaking adorable!

Find you someone who looks at you the way Jonah Hill looks at Emma Stone 😻

Even though I will never stop being salty about the yellowface thing, even I have to admit Emma Stone gave it her all in La La Land, and, acting-wise, at least, it was an irresistibly charming performance. She was by far the best thing about LLL, and never in her wildest dreams could prissy Emma Watson have given that performance. There were moments when I got lost in Stone’s massive eyes, Bambi's in size and sea-green in colour and her rendition of 'Audition (Here's to the Fools Who Dream)' was spectacular. Much worse performances have won the Best Actress Oscar (hi Jennifer Lawrence), so I've made my peace with her winning.

I'm pretty pleased with the SAG results yesterday, three of the four film acting awards going to people of colour is incredible!

Clever Girl (and Thirsty Girl).

The ultimate date movie Gone Girl is on Netflix, which allows me to pore over every shot and admire the precision with which David Fincher bought the novel to life. A touch I particularly liked was displaying Amy's undergraduate and Masters certificates:

Like the scheming eponymous lead, I also hold an undergraduate and a Masters degree. Unlike Amy Wexford Elliot Dunne, however, they're from institutions slightly less distinguished than Harvard and Yale.

All that being said, if my brother succeeds in graduating from Cambridge, then gets his MSc from Oxford or an American Ivy League, then he can consider himself as decorated as Amy!

--

I saw The Light Between Oceans yesterday. I thought it was absolutely bloody awful (Light Between Oceans? More like SHITE between Oceans), bloated, over-sentimental, and various characters' actions didn't seem consistent with their personality that they'd exhibited previously. It was even worse than The Place Beyond the Pines, if that's possible.

Although Michael Fassbender and Alicia Vikander both gave strong, affecting performances as the parents who are blighted with miscarriage upon miscarriage, I'm starting to find Alicia Vikander's continual thirst for Oscar glory a little trying. You just won one girl, calm down a bit!

This frustrates me because there's no doubt that Vikander is a great actress (loved her work as the alluring robot Ava in Ex Machina), but I feel her talents would be put to better use if she didn't try so hard. That she won the Oscar this year for her work in The Danish Girl, a film which encompasses the Trifecta of Awards Thirst: Eddie Redcarpet, director Tom Hooper and Alicia, illustrates that begging for awards can reap its desired effect.

Personally, I'm not averse to an actor campaigning relentlessly if I thought they deserved the gold (#YouDoYou), which is why I'm a lot more forgiving to Anne Hathaway for working the awards circuit, hard, in 2013, because she slayed as Fantine.

But it's just a shame Alicia had to win and in doing so, stealing Rooney Mara's Oscar for such a brazenly awards-orientated role of the put-upon supportive wife, as opposed to her more intelligent and restrained performances in Ex Machina or The Man from U.N.C.L.E, performances that were far more engaging and allowed her natural grace to shine, rather than sobbing incessantly, which was all she did in The Danish Girl. I like my Oscar-winning acting turns to come with a bit more nuance.

I do like Alicia (when I saw her first in 2012's Anna Karenina I described her as 'a very pretty Swedish actress'), and those big brown eyes of hers were just made for emoting. And despite The Light Between Oceans craving awards, it probably won't receive them, as the film has (rightly) been received with muted reception in the US, so graciously, I won't have to resent her more during this year's Oscar season.

But with another Oscar-begging title out next year, Tulip Fever, I'm afraid I'm going to have to brand Alicia Vikander the female Eddie Redmayne in terms of serially appearing in awards-bait. Eddie Redmayne has a less-than-flattering monicker 'Eddie Redcarpet', given in reference to how he played a disabled character and a transgender character, back to back, in order to receive an Oscar win and a nomination, respectively. Alicia Vikander is approaching this level of strategic film choices, and thus, I have no choice but to dub her, Felicia Vikander.

Side note: Alicia wasn't the only one guilty of being a little too keen to win her Oscar this year, as Leonardo DiCaprio and Brie Larson were campaigning endlessly, to the point where it also turned me off Brie (I thought Saoirse Ronan should have won for her majestic performance in Brooklyn). Between those three, they made 2016 the desperate Oscar campaign I'd ever had the misfortune of witnessing. (I love you Leo, but was The Revenant a cold shoot by any chance? You hadn't mentioned).

These three's Oscar thirst was further accentuated when compared to the behaviour of Brit Mark Rylance, winner of Best Supporting Actor, who did zero campaigning, and didn't even show up to BAFTA, the movie award body of his homeland, to accept his gong, because he was acting on Broadway at the time.

So, whilst thirst paid off in Leo, Alicia and Brie's cases, it's encouraging to see that some actors don't feel the need to try so hard, and were happy to let their acting do the talking.

The Shade Between BBFC Insight.

Derek Cianfrance, the director of the sobering romantic drama Blue Valentine as well as the ambitious but ultimately disappointing The Place Beyond the Pines, both starring Ryan Gosling, has another film out this year, not starring Ryan Gosling. The film in question has a clunky title to rival its predecessor: The Light Between Oceans.

This film is already out in the States but is not released here until November, although it has been given a BBFC rating. It is rated 12A, unsurprisingly, given it got a PG-13 in the States (and as you should know by now, ~90% of PG-13s align to 12As here, and if they don’t, I usually write a blog discussing/questioning why).

The short insight made me cackle, as, if I didn’t know better, I would think the BBFC were throwing shade at the movie’s male and female leads:

The film revolves around a lighthouse keeper and his wife, who discover a baby washed up on the shore. Having grappled with conception and several heartbreaking miscarriages, they decide to raise the baby as their own. The protagonists are played by Michael Fassbender and stealer of Rooney Mara’s Oscar this year Alicia Vikander, who are a couple in real life.

However, the more cynical of moviegoers don’t buy this, and think that their relationship is a Weinstein Company-manufactured showmance, created for the PR of The Light Between Oceans; a belief given further fuel during the BAFTA ceremony this year, when the Kiss Cam centred on them and they refused to smooch. One person believes this showmance theory so much they even have a Tumblr account about it.

I’m undecided about the veracity of the claims on that Tumblr account, and frankly, celebrities’ love lives are none of my goddamn business anyway. But I was tickled by the BBFC insight, and immediately wondered if the BBFC were in their own way, giving a veiled message about how much they bought into the Fassbender/Vikander relationship. 

As if describing their sex life as ‘infrequent’ wasn’t bad enough… ‘moderate’, too. Dayum.

(Or, you know, they were just genuinely describing the content of the film and I could be reading too much into three words and need to stop assuming everyone is as Shady McGrady as I am.)

-- 

In other sort of BBFC-related news, when my brother turned 18 this year, I couldn’t resist using it as an excuse to a) give a shoutout to my favourite film certification board and b) plug three excellent films that I'm always hollering at him to watch in order to enrich our level of repartee and inside jokes at others' expense.

Channel 4 pulled a blinder on Sunday night, screening The Wolf of Wall Street, so I forced Tom to watch it, which is good because for the sake of completeness, we’ve watched practically all the Jonah Hill movies together now (minus True Story, but I have zero interest in that film; it looks like a prolonged, failed, Oscar beg on his and James Franco’s part and no one got any time for that. It was gruelling enough having to sit through Jonah’s WoWS co-star beg for his Oscar).

Tom, being the good man that he is, said he enjoyed it a lot, especially given that he’d caught an outdoor screening The Big Short in London last week and found it dry A F. I’m glad his mathematical prowess translates to being able to determine the wheat from the chaff in terms of films about finance, too.

As I’ve said before, several of the clown dude-bros who I’ve had the serious misfortune of going on dates with fancy themselves a kind of Leo in WoWS-type character, so it was funny to watch the film with Tom and delve into the psyche of these clowns (or so they wish).

Next up from that Facebook status, I’ll be bullying my brother into watching Gone Girl, so he can understand the psyche of the woman these clowns have chosen to go on a date with. 

(or so I wish).

Good Dads.

I watched War Dogs and Bad Moms this weekend, and it must be the hot weather or something, because, in addition to guffawing heartily at both comedies, I was ogling the actors in both films. 

In War Dogs, I yo-yo'd between swooning at Miles Teller and his on-screen girlfriend Ana De Armas (she played one of the nutty chicks who raped Keanu Reeves in in Knock Knock). And in Bad Moms I both admired Mila Kunis' impossibly shiny hair (a real-life overworked mum definitely would never look that sleek!) and stunning hazel eyes and grinned goofily at her on-screen love-interest Jay Hernandez.

This made me notice that in 2016 alone, I've been treated to my share of male eye candy in movies. Thought I'd share pictures of some of the hotties in question.

The DILFs

Miles Teller, War Dogs

I'm currently fangirling so hard for Miles Teller. I even watched Two Night Stand last night just to stare at him. His arrogant swagger and slightly douchey off-screen demeanour renders him even sexier to me for some reason (Freud, feel free to go to town on this one). His bromance with Jonah Hill was brilliant and the two's joie de vivre really made War Dogs the entertaining movie it was albeit one that stole very liberally from The Wolf of Wall Street. And every time Miles Teller grinned.... SWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON. Dat smile.

Jay Hernandez, Bad Moms

Diablo from Suicide Squad doesn't clean up too badly, eh?

Ryan Gosling, The Nice Guys

Ryan Gosling is so fine that he can even make that ridiculous moustache work.

The younger models

Dave Franco, Nerve

Definitely the hottest Franco brother!

Dave Franco, Now You See Me 2

Lizzy Caplan's character in Now You See Me 2 says to Franco's, 'that face doesn't belong behind the screens'. PREACH.

Dave Franco, Bad Neighbours 2

If Hollywood cast this pretty man in a movie, I'll always watch it. No matter how much dross it is. Especially if it's a double bill of dishy with...

Zac Efron, Bad Neighbours 2

Zac Efron, Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates

I'm glad I watched this film by myself, because every five minutes I kept muttering 'Zac Efron is SO HOT!!!!' to myself. He's just got it all: the face and the physique. Genuinely don't think we've seen such a fine example of the male form since Leonardo DiCaprio in his William Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet and Titanic-days. 

Take a bow, Zac preferably in an ill-fitting, tight T-shirt.

And finally.... The non-human 

Nick, Zootropolis

Before you call animal services on me, I'd like a chance to justify this slightly left of field inclusion. Nick is sensitive, witty, resourceful, caring, and the quintessential bad boy who keeps his walls up because he was hurt in the past. I love film characters like this, so it's no surprise I was drawn to Nick.

Plus, for a fox, he is kinda handsome, eh? EH????

My 10 Favourite Performances of 2012.

Powering through the series where I list my top 10 acting performances by year. Remember, the top 10 isn't so much a list of the top 10 best acting performances, per se, but more me playing favourites to actors and actresses I really dig, as well as performances that gave me the feels. You know, to quote Family Guy, 'all the things that make us, laugh and cry'. Which is ironic because a certain prominent member of the Family Guy cast is on this list. It's almost like I set up my own joke, isn't it?

If you're wondering why no performances from Lincoln or The Master are on the list, it's because I haven't seen those films. If you're wondering why none from Silver Linings Playbook is on, that'll be because I despise that dishonest movie with every bone in my body, and cannot abide Jennifer Lawrence's hammy, OTT, shrill performance in it, which was not an accurate portrayal of a woman with mental health issues at all, so much so, that the mental health community had backlash about her acting in it. There, I said it. J-law did not deserve to win that goddamn Oscar. The lady who I have listed first should have received the award instead, for what was, in my opinion, one of the best acting performances of all time.

10. Amandla Stenberg, The Hunger Games

09. Kristen Stewart, On the Road

08. Quvenzhané Wallis, Beasts of the Southern Wild

07. Jonah Hill, 21 Jump Street

06. Jessica Chastain, Zero Dark Thirty

05. Seth MacFarlane, Ted

04. Leonardo DiCaprio, Django Unchained

03. Keira Knightley, Anna Karenina

02. Anne Hathaway, Les Miserables

01. Emmanuelle Riva, Amour

A couple of stats...

By Gender
Gals: 7
Dudes: 3

By BBFC certificate
18: 1
15: 4

12A: 5 (my favourite is Beast of the Southern Wild's warning: 'Contains moderate threat, injury detail and potentially dangerous behaviour')

Shameless favouritism (people who've been on before)

Keira Knightley: 8th in 2014 for The Imitation Game

Leonardo DiCaprio: 2nd in 2006 (for The Depahted; hi Scorsese!) and 9th (Blood Diamond) although that list was constructed a l-o-n-g time ago and would be subject to change, 2nd in 2010 (Shutter Island; another Scorsese collab!), 2nd in 2013 (The Wolf of Wall Street; directed by some Martin Scorsese bloke I haven't heard of)
Jessica Chastain: 10th in 2014 (for A Most Violent Year)

Jonah Hill: 3rd in 2014 (for 22 Jump Street; the sequel to the film he's on this list for. I'm pretty brazen with my Jonah fangirling), 9th in 2013 (The Wolf of Wall Street)

My 10 Favourite Performances of 2013.

Making my way through the backlog, as promised. 2014's list and 2015's.

10. Bérénice Bejo, Le passé

09. Jonah Hill, The Wolf of Wall Street

(the bromance between these two gives me life! ❤️)

08. Melissa McCarthy, The Heat

07. Lindsay Lohan, The Canyons 

Lindsay got nominated for a Razzie(!!!!) for her performance here. Between that, and awarding Dakota Johnson 50 Shades of Grey last year, when both actresses did commendably with poorly written roles, I think it's safe to say the Razzies wouldn't be able to tell a good performance if it tied them up.

06. Rooney Mara, Side Effects 

She's so pretty. ❤️

05. Léa Seydoux, Blue is the Warmest Colour

Epic Blue is the Warmest Colour post incoming. You have been warned!

04. Lupita Nyong’o, 12 Years a Slave

Thank God this amazing performance of earth-shattering pathos and deep complexity took home the Oscar, and in doing so, beating Jennifer Lawrence's unbearable hamming in a role she was several decades too young for, in American Hustle!

03. Chiwetel Ejiofor, 12 Years a Slave 


02. Leonardo DiCaprio, The Wolf of Wall Street 

Every other film has stills but Wolf of Wall Street performers are allowed gifs. Because a photo doesn't capture the full comedy of Martin Scorsese's 3-hour unforgettable, profane, & absolutely hilarious vilification or celebration? of heady Wall Street financiers.

01. Adèle Exarchopoulos, Blue is the Warmest Colour

Will give Adèle and Léa the full attention and commendation they deserve in a future entry dedicated to this amazing movie. 

So, a French actress opening the 2013 list and a French actress closing it! Spoiler alert: when I do my favourite performances of 2012 list, a French actress will also (comfortably) be topping that list as well! Although, unfortunately, in that case, Jennifer Lawrence succeeded in stealing her Oscar. #NeverGettingOverIt

--

Breakdown by BBFC rating 
18: 5
15: 4
12A: 1

Chaps: 3
Chicks: 7

Recurring stars

Rooney Mara: 2nd in 2015 (for Carol)

Leonardo DiCaprio: 2nd in 2006 (for The Depahted; hi Scorsese!) and 9th (Blood Diamond) although that list was constructed a l-o-n-g time ago and would be subject to change, 2nd in 2010 (Shutter Island; another Scorsese collab!)

Jonah Hill: 3rd in 2014 (for 22 Jump Street)

My 10 Favourite Performances in an 18-Rated Movie.

I watched The Canyons this week, a Kickstarter-funded movie about the sexual jealousy and betrayal between a hedonistic movie producer and his glamorous girlfriend (Lindsay Lohan). The fact that the film was low-budget was apparent in the shoddy production value, lazy script and daytime TV-esque performances, but Lindsay Lohan was genuinely brilliant, even more so if you consider she had to deliver laughably bad lines and make them plausible. The high quality of her performance jarred with everything else about the film, which was extremely cheap and trashy, but at least it inspired me to do another list: favourite 18-rated performances.

Certain directors seem to be drawn to darker content than others, so it's no surprise that this list features multiple entries from films from three directors: two Fincher-directed performances (both fierce women who like a bit of revenge), two Quentin Tarantino-directed performances, and three Martin Scorsese directed-performances. But not the two seminal Robert de Niro turns (Taxi Driver, Raging Bull) that you might expect to see.

Very honourable mentions: Emily Watson in Breaking the Waves, Christoph Waltz in Inglourious Basterds, Daniel Day-Lewis in Gangs of New York, Uma Thurman in Kill Bill Vol. 1  and Pulp Fiction, Dennis Hopper in Blue Velvet (another spirit animal of mine. I jest. Or do I?), Lindsay Lohan in The Canyons, Léa Seydoux in Blue is the Warmest Colour, Leonardo DiCaprio in The Depahted, Dominique Swain in Lolita and Jonah Hill in The Wolf of Wall Street (heard he gets his penis out in a pool party scene or something).

10. Ray Liotta, Goodfellas

1990. director: Martin Scorsese. Rated 18 for strong violence.

09. Bel Powley, Diary of a Teenage Girl

2015. director: Marielle Heller. Rated 18 for strong sex.

08. Rooney Mara, The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo 

2011. director: David Fincher. Rated 18 for strong sexual violence and sex.

07. Leonardo DiCaprio, The Wolf of Wall Street 

2013. director: Martin Scorsese. Rated 18 for very strong language, strong sex and hard drug use.

06. Sharon Stone, Casino

1995. director: Martin Scorsese. Rated 18 for strong violence. Not like a Scorsese film to have strong violence, now is it?

05. Mélanie Laurent, Inglourious Basterds

2009. director: Quentin Tarantino. Rated 18 for strong bloody violence.

I idolised her back in 2010, and I still idolise her now. Au revoir, Shoshanna!

04. Michael Madsen, Reservoir Dogs

1992. director: Quentin Tarantino. Rated 18 for strong bloody violence, torture, strong language & sex references 

03. Kevin Spacey, American Beauty

1999. director: Sam Mendes. Rated 18 for strong language, once very strong, strong sex, violence & drug use 

It's interesting I had Dominque Swain as Dolores 'Lolita' Haze in my honourable mentions list, for this film, one of my top 15 of all-time, has heavy Lolita overtones running throughout. Even Kevin Spacey's character's name, Lester Burnham, is an anagram of 'Humbert Learns'.

And the top two, which was an absolute no-brainer...

02. Adèle Exarchopoulos, Blue is the Warmest Colour

2013.  director: Abdellatif Kechiche. Rated 18 for strong sex and very strong language.

01. Rosamund Pike, Gone Girl

2014. director: David Fincher. Rated 18 for strong bloody violence and very strong language.

Surprise!