10 Finest Fellas in a 2009 Film

Happy Hump Day! My picks for male babes of 2009. If you were wondering if I had a 'type', feel free to peruse my lists from previous years!

10. Michael Fassbender, Inglourious Basterds

10 Finest Fellas in a 2010 Film

Happy Hump Day! 2011's list, if you were bored.

10. Ken Watanabe, Inception

Dishiest chaps in a 2012 film.

Happy Valentines Day readers! What better way to celebrate than with ten dishy dudes! For the 10 most alluring ladies of 2012, click here!

10. Chace Crawford, What to Expect When You're Expecting

10 Fittest Chaps in Film, 2014.

Happy Hump Day! Previous entry in this series (which contains a link to the preceding entry in the series, and so on). Also, Happy Birthday to my Irish queen and my pick for Best Actress of 2015, Saoirse Ronan!

10. Miles Teller, Whiplash 

10 Fittest Males in Film, 2016.

I’ve gone off Ryan Gosling because I still have ear damage from his singing, Dev Patel’s bad acting in Lion put me off him and Aaron Taylor-Johnson, whilst being an absolute babe in real-life and the best husband ever to his lucky wife, played a vile character in Nocturnal Animals, hence their omissions from the list.

The ladies version of the list, if you were curious.

10. Andre Holland, Moonlight 

Good Dads.

I watched War Dogs and Bad Moms this weekend, and it must be the hot weather or something, because, in addition to guffawing heartily at both comedies, I was ogling the actors in both films. 

In War Dogs, I yo-yo'd between swooning at Miles Teller and his on-screen girlfriend Ana De Armas (she played one of the nutty chicks who raped Keanu Reeves in in Knock Knock). And in Bad Moms I both admired Mila Kunis' impossibly shiny hair (a real-life overworked mum definitely would never look that sleek!) and stunning hazel eyes and grinned goofily at her on-screen love-interest Jay Hernandez.

This made me notice that in 2016 alone, I've been treated to my share of male eye candy in movies. Thought I'd share pictures of some of the hotties in question.

The DILFs

Miles Teller, War Dogs

I'm currently fangirling so hard for Miles Teller. I even watched Two Night Stand last night just to stare at him. His arrogant swagger and slightly douchey off-screen demeanour renders him even sexier to me for some reason (Freud, feel free to go to town on this one). His bromance with Jonah Hill was brilliant and the two's joie de vivre really made War Dogs the entertaining movie it was albeit one that stole very liberally from The Wolf of Wall Street. And every time Miles Teller grinned.... SWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON. Dat smile.

Jay Hernandez, Bad Moms

Diablo from Suicide Squad doesn't clean up too badly, eh?

Ryan Gosling, The Nice Guys

Ryan Gosling is so fine that he can even make that ridiculous moustache work.

The younger models

Dave Franco, Nerve

Definitely the hottest Franco brother!

Dave Franco, Now You See Me 2

Lizzy Caplan's character in Now You See Me 2 says to Franco's, 'that face doesn't belong behind the screens'. PREACH.

Dave Franco, Bad Neighbours 2

If Hollywood cast this pretty man in a movie, I'll always watch it. No matter how much dross it is. Especially if it's a double bill of dishy with...

Zac Efron, Bad Neighbours 2

Zac Efron, Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates

I'm glad I watched this film by myself, because every five minutes I kept muttering 'Zac Efron is SO HOT!!!!' to myself. He's just got it all: the face and the physique. Genuinely don't think we've seen such a fine example of the male form since Leonardo DiCaprio in his William Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet and Titanic-days. 

Take a bow, Zac preferably in an ill-fitting, tight T-shirt.

And finally.... The non-human 

Nick, Zootropolis

Before you call animal services on me, I'd like a chance to justify this slightly left of field inclusion. Nick is sensitive, witty, resourceful, caring, and the quintessential bad boy who keeps his walls up because he was hurt in the past. I love film characters like this, so it's no surprise I was drawn to Nick.

Plus, for a fox, he is kinda handsome, eh? EH????

Sexiest film Characters of 2010.

Not gonna lie, I am a bit of a horny bung. I love doing these lists, because it is essentially just an excuse for me to trawl through the web for yummy pics of yummy people.

Men

01. Andrew Garfield, The Social Network

I remember, back in 2009, when me and my two best friends Luke and Anna were in the Little Theatre, Bath, watching The Imaginarium of Dr Parnassus. It was a horrifically shoddy movie and we were not impressed. However, there was one bright spot to the entire film, and that came in the form of Jewish cutie pie Andrew Garfield, or, as I thought of him, “him off Sugar Rush.” 

It was such a delight to see him cast as the awkward, clumsy comedy part, as that is a role that I feel suits him to a T. Little did I know that in 2010, he’d be turning heads in a huge fashion in sci-fi drama Never Let Me Go alongside Keira Knightley and Carey Mulligan, as well as the probable Oscar winner for Best Pic, The Social Network, a film I’d just watched yesterday. And not only does he give a wonderful performance, but he is just so, irresistibly cute, dorky and fine! I would quite happily be his groupie.

02. Rupert Grint, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part I

Oh, Rupert! Whilst the seventh Harry Potter film didn’t fill me with as much childish glee and thrill as, say, Prisoner of Azkaban or Order of the Phoenix did, Rupert Grint, was, as ever, a joy to watch throughout. And, when he takes his shirt off? Goddamn. Little boy’s all grown up!

03. Zac Efron, Charlie St. Cloud

Watched this on New Year’s Eve with my mates and, I was the topic of some jesting because my cheeks were literally going red whenever Mr. Efron was on screen. I have a bit of a love/hate relationship with Zac Efron, but one thing remains sure – I do think he’s fit.

04. Leonardo DiCaprio, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Tom Hardy & Cillian Murphy, Inception

Now, as you may or may not know, I wasn’t exactly the biggest fan of Inception. Ha, that’s somewhat of an understatement; it currently stands as my second least favourite film of 2010, just behind Enter the Void. But, I can’t deny no way my d-d-dirty mind was perving on the fit guys instead of watching the pretentious film itself. I was loving the homoerotic undertones between Gordon-Levitt and Hardy, Cillian Murphy is never not beautiful, and Leo, even though he had more than a touch of the Shutter Island crazy that he sported in the other film of 2010, works a suit very well indeed.

05. Taylor Lautner, Twilight: Eclipse

I hate me too, don’t worry. But that body! UNF.

And, a few Non-film entries…

Peter Crouch, footballer (Spurs)

Standard, innit. Crouchie didn’t exactly set goal-scoring records alight in 2010, but one of his few goals that he did score – the winner in the fourth place showdown between Manchester City and Tottenham, was enough to bung Spurs into the Champions League. I still maintain that he should have started in all the games for England in the World Cup too, then we may have actually got somewhere. But oh well. Tall giant is tall. And awesome.

Robert Sheehan, The Misfits

The Misfits was one of my main discoveries of 2010, and I now adore the show. It’s essentially Heroes-meets-Skins, but unlike Heroes, there’s a small number of characters so that we can actually follow the plot and we’re not swamped with pseudo-Science, and unlike Skins, the characters aren’t posers who think they have swagger when they’re just slutty. Anyway, Robert Sheehan’s Irish accent, corkscrew curls and cheeky chappy demeanour made him completely irresistible, especially when he’s slashing it up with Iwan Rheon.

Frank Lampard, footballer (Chelsea)

Huh. As if he wasn’t gonna get a mention!

Gurls

01. Mila Kunis, Black Swan

02. Eva Mendes, The Other Guys

03. Emma Stone, Easy A

04. Kaya Scodelario, Shank

05. Tamsin Egerton, 4.3.2.1

Film review: HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL 3 [sarcasm alert haha]

At the time of writing this, High School Musical 3: Senior Year has an extremely lowly rating of 3.3/10 on IMDb. This saddens me greatly. My friend Luke and I watched HSM3 this Wednesday, due to it being 3.30 and W. not starting until 5.30, and HSM3 starting at 3.45pm. I’m delighted that we made this choice, because it proved to be everything that cinema isn’t these days – intelligent, moving, witty, and so, so, well acted.

Troy and Gabriella are now in their final year of high school, and they still haven’t bunged. In fact, it takes them 90 whole minutes of celluloid to even have a kiss. And even then it’s not a proper kiss. Anyway, it’s time to go to college. Troy’s dad wants him to pursue his basketball, and Gabriella’s doing Law somewhere far away. Naturally, they have preoccupations over whether or not their oh-so-deep relationship will stand this trying test, but it’s nothing the odd song or two can’t sing. In fact, Gabriella even decides it would be a cool thing to – on top of all the exams they have – put on one last school musical.

Meanwhile, Sharpay’s gotten herself a Machiavellian British little manservant, her camp brother Ryan’s trying to prove to the world that he’s not really gay by winking at the girl that plays the piano, and Troy’s basketball buddy Chad is gonna miss his mate. Oh the woes.

Despite the achingly fresh and original storyline, HSM3 still stays true to its bubblegum roots, wherein all the characters will be break into song whenever they damn well please – whether that be in asking a girl to prom, in the middle of a basketball game, or, best of all – in a deserted garage, where the scene between Troy and Chad is bromancetastic.

Vanessa Hudgens deserves an Oscar for her heart-wrenching performance of the teenage girl who is torn between her loves – her education, and her stunning, not at all impotent boyfriend, although this really is a group effort, with the entire cast not putting a foot wrong throughout the entire film.

If you do not cry at the scene in which Troy finds Gabriella and they have their private prom moment, then I tell you, you have no heart. Everything in HSM3 has been building up to this moment, which is in itself a terrifically post-modern homage to Shakespearean courtly scenes. Everything about this film is perfect, and I so wish that I could sing like Ashley Tisdale.

(Nah, seriously, I liked it quite a bit – 7/10. It was totally shit of course, but ya know, in a good way. It was much funnier than Burn After Reading, at any rate. The gospel version of “We’re All in this Together” was good fun.)

Screening Log.

I never keep this damn things up, but that ain’t gonna stop me starting again. No sirree. Alright, films I saw this weekend.

High School Musical 2 (Kenny Ortega, 2007)

Hilarious, but for all the wrong reasons. Terrible acting, predictable plot, contrived characters… it was neither a step up nor a step down from its predecessor. Actually, one thing it did lack was catchy songs. HSM had “We’re All in This Together” which I’ll never forget because we sang it because we sang it in our Sixth Form Revue, as well as “Getcha Head in the Game” and “Stick to the Status Quo”. Only “Bet on it” from HSM2 will linger in my memory, and that was for Zac Efron’s dodgy dancing as much as anything. One thing that really brought the lolls, however, was how that girl was always conveniently around to play the piano whenever Troy and Gabriela needed it. Ffs.

Never Been Kissed (Raja Gosnell, 1999)

Oh, ♥. It may be because I’m feeling amorous because of the season, or me feeling soppy because I believe I’m in love, or pure nostalgia for my secondary school (cringey days and all), but practically everything about this film was endearing to me. 

Firstly, you’ve got Drew Barrymore at her loveliest, as newspaper copyright editor Josie. In order to make it as a reporter, she needs to go undercover in a high school. She, like most of us, had a pretty torrid time at high school, and after some initial failures in trying to be cool, her brother (played by David Arquette) helps her make it with the cool crowd. 

There’s a great supporting cast (including the ever-lovable John C. Reilly), some hilarious moments (the bananas…lol) a cute soundtrack, but what I loved most about this film was the chemistry between Barrymore and her teacher Michael Vartan. 

The ending, though broaching morally dubious territory, considering he thought she was a student the whole time, was still lovely, and I was so happy for Josie.

Ballad of a Soldier (Grigori Chukhrai, 1959)

Continuing with my “watching a film ‘cos it’s Russian”, I went for this minor masterpiece. Ballad of a Soldier points out how single minded and silly it would be to beef on the Russians and the beauty that an individual is capable of. Like Turtles Can Fly, Ballad of a Soldier captures the detrimental effect of war toward the country and the individual. It’s about one soldier, who possesses all the attributes that a good person should have, and is granted 6 days to go on leave: 2 to get there, 2 to spend with his mother (wherein he plans to fix her roof) and two days to return. However, in his journey, he comes across a range of people that need help, and in helping them, delay his arrival. He also develops a romance in the film, but we’re not even treated to a kiss… :( We’re told from the off that he doesn’t survive the war, but that didn’t stop me crying my eyes out at the end. Completely moving and heart-breakingly beautiful, this is highly recommended.