Nice dinner I had last week with work.

As part of a client dinner, my Company prepared this gorgeous and delicious meal last week. It tasted and looked brilliant, so I thought it would be rude not to share pictures of all the courses!

Restaurant review: PREZZO (New Oxford Street)

Now that there’s a post-Oscar lull, my blog feels weirdly directionless. I’m currently consuming any black and white films I can get my hands on, so expect random review of classic movies! I shall also attempt to make my way through the huge backlog of restaurants and bars I’ve frequented (although the rate I dine out far outstrips the rate at which I review places!).

I attended Prezzo with a BuyAGift voucher, where the deal on the website was £30 for a three-course-meal with a glass of wine.

Restaurant review: GALVIN AT WINDOWS (Mayfair)

Back in February, I had the pleasure of being able to try the five-course tasting menu at Galvin at Windows, at the Park Lane Hilton. With the exception of Yuauatcha and Sticks’n’Sushi, I rarely dine at expensive places, so when I got the opportunity to, it always feels like a special occasion!

Restaurant review: SHAKA ZULU (Camden Town)

The post-Christmas back-to-work lull one experiences in January can be quite depressing. To alleviate those January blues somewhat, London restaurants are just waiting to be explored by you, and with Groupon, LivingSocial and Wowcher deals facilitating all this, it seemed rude not to.

First thing’s first: the décor of the place was absolutely exceptional. Here’s a photo: -

Restaurant review: CARLUCCIO'S (Smithfield)

Carluccio's is a spacious, welcoming Italian restaurant, with very reasonable prices. I dined there for a team dinner a few months ago, when we all had the set menu (3 courses for £17.99, a £3.50 surcharge for the steak).

Restaurant review: GILGAMESH (Camden)

Gilgamesh advertises itself as a pan-Asian restaurant, bar and nightclub. I visited it with my brother using a LivingSocial deal that I had bought for £34. The deal entitled us to afternoon tea and free-flowing Prosecco for two hours. I personally tend to find LivingSocial deals more honourable than Groupon ones, and the 'unlimited Prosecco for 2 hours' part of the deal appealed to me.

Restaurant review: CHAPTER ONE (Orpington)

Chapter One is basically the only restaurant in Orpington to carry any kind of distinction. It used to possess one Michelin star (was sadly stripped of it in 2014), but for Bromley, that's enough to make it stand out. I’d never been there before, but for my 27th birthday, my friend Joy kindly treated me to a three course meal on the lunchtime menu there.

A delicious three course meal at my friend's wedding.

Last month, I attended my friend's beautiful wedding in Bristol (OOTD here). Here are some pictures I took, including part of the awesome three-course meal we had!

RESTAURANT REVIEW: Gaucho (Picadilly Circus)

Seeking to right the wrong I outlined here of having not been to enough steakhouses in the capital, I popped just down the road from the last place I visited, to Gaucho, a famous Argentinian steakhouse. 

A fabulous three course meal at the Scarman Conference Centre, University of Warwick.

I attended a conference at the University of Warwick this April, and on one of the evenings, we were all treated to a delicious three course meal. Here are the courses:

Salmon starter. Such a generous (and appetising) portion of seafood! (I love seafood btw; whenever I'm at McDonald's I always get the filet o'fish).

Product reviews: BOX OF SIX MACARONS (Ladurée) and POSH PROFITEROLES (Marks and Spencer)

"Not really your kind of place, is it?"

Restaurant review: TRUC VERT (Mayfair)

Bungled away down one of the hectic Oxford Circus sidestreets is French restaurant Truc Vert. I went last November using a LivingSocial deal but amazingly, it bucked the trend set by their rival deal site, Groupon, in that dining at Truc Vert was actually a positive experience!

Truc Vert has elegant European-style furnishings but graciously, unlike Hawksmoor, say, isn’t so over-ornate that the decorations feel ominous.

For starters, we ordered:

Restaurant Review: VIBE GELATERIA BAR (Orpington)

Me and my friend had an hour to kill before Bridget Jones’ Baby last week so we gave Vibe, the latest dessert parlour to open in Orpington, our patronage. (To be quite honest, there are now more ice cream places than Orpington needs. After all, the town only has a population of 15,000!)

I complained about one of Vibe’s main competitors, Cream’s, for having idiots for sales assistants, but at least the quality of their ice cream was infallible. The same cannot be said for Vibe, which was selling something as crap as this for £5.50:

It probably looks harmless, but the ingredients had a distinctly C-list taste to it, as opposed to Cream’s, where I was wolfing down my ice cream due to the moreish components of the inventions. Also, if you just peruse over the menus of the two parlours, you’ll find that you’ll get much value for £5 at Creams’ than you will here. And the banana tasted off. Just saying.

The main thing that irritated me about Vibe, however, wasn’t the below-par ice cream, but the ‘service’ (if you can call it that) that we got from the pushy waiter. Because Vibe has just opened, they were doing a deal, which was all cocktails a fiver. Normally, I’d be all over that; there are precious few things that make me happier than a good cocktail. But, like everything in life that I enjoy, there’s a time and a place for everything. A weekday where both of us had work the next day wasn’t the time for a cocktail, so we politely declined. Yet, he still kept trying to pressure us into buying one.

This man seriously needs a lesson in consent. No means NO. A fiver isn’t much money by any stretch of the imagination, but it’s still OUR money, and up to us how to see fit how to dispense the money. If we said we didn’t feel like a cocktail, he shouldn’t have been so damn persistent. Especially when, in a desperate attempt to stay relevant, the cocktails were named after films, and the Word Art job on the menu was not the most enticing: -

‘Godfather’ is one word, just saying. And maybe they should have named one of the cocktails 'Enchantress', given that if this gelateria were an actress, it would be Cara Delevingne.

Something else which irked me was that when I got my phone out to take a photo of the creation, to point out how poor value for £5.50 it offers compared to Cream’s £4.75 creation, the waiter asked me to check into Facebook, to ‘raise publicity for Vibe, as it had just opened’.

Mate, do I look like a shill to you? And even shills get paid. If he wanted me to check in, he should have said they’d waive the fee of the (crap) ice cream, or throw in something free for us. I sure wasn’t going to publicly acknowledge I’d been to this hellhole on Facebook for free. Nothing for nothing in this world, mate. Nothing for nothing.

Final part of the rant: the manager of the restaurant was working that evening, cruising each of the tables to ingratiate himself with the punters. He spent more time with tables which were larger, which is completely fair enough, as by Law of Averages, there’s more people on that table that are likely to generate word of mouth about Vibe. But when he came over to our table, all we got was a brief ‘good evening?’ and before we’d had time to give a decent response, he’d bounced onto the next table.

I am not impressed with that. We may have been but two mid-20s girls who seemed reluctant to part with our money, and sharing one dessert between two of us, but we were still paying customers like everyone else there. The manager made a huge oversight by ignoring us. I can generate word of mouth too, mate. Ever heard of a blog?

It’s probably a tad injudicious of me to keep reviewing places in Orpington, and being a Jennifer Lawrence-in-American Hustle-esque cow in my appraisals, given I can see myself slowly talking myself into being a persona non grata in most restaurants in this suburban town.

But I’m not the type of customer who takes being mistreated lying down. And when I can pop to Tesco’s and buy myself a tub of Neapolitan ice cream and dust some sprinkles on top, why would I want to visit Vibe again? My own makeshift dessert would be infinitely more delicious and substantially cheaper than the crap they offer at Vibe, and graciously not come with a side order of ‘bad attitude’.

#ByeFelicia

Grade: U

Cake watch: banoffee pie (John Lewis)

The cream, chocolate on the cream and fudge binding everything together was a dream, but the base tasted a little stale. Overall, still delicious, but a tiny bit below John Lewis' (admittedly much higher than average) bar.

Grade: A-

Restaurant review: BACCO RESTAURANT AND WINE BAR (Holborn)

Bacco is an extremely classy Italian restaurant that’s somewhat hidden in Holborn. One can’t help thinking that it would have the volume of clients it merits if it were located in trendy Shoreditch or Soho instead, but the fact that it wasn’t jam packed meant that people who visited benefited from almost exclusive service, something that would be unheard of in the better known London districts.

It’s worth hunting the location of Bacco out because the restaurant and wine bar, like Jonah Hill’s acting skills, is remarkably versatile: it can be visited for a romantic dinner, yet also represents a great avenue for a boozy night out with friends.

I had spaghetti bolognese and I’m genuinely not hyperbolising when I’m saying it was the best spag bol I’ve ever had! It put every other spag bol I’ve ever had to shame, especially the dross I had the misfortune of being served at Theo Randall, which, even though occurred five years ago, was so overpriced and disgusting that it’s etched into my memory. 

At a lot of restaurants in London you either get quality or quantity with your dishes and not both. Sadly it's just an artefact of visiting London restaurants; these places ride on their location. But my main here, pictured above, had both; diners are treated to a hearty amount of delicious cooking. The way the beef, chilli, cheese and spaghetti intertwined was heavenly, and whatever herbs the chefs used,  they really bought out the flavour of the meal.

The dessert was also fabulous, a tiramisu with a macaroon on the side. The macaroon wasn’t just there to look pretty, it tasted amazing, and gave the dessert an extra dimension. I loved that the tiramisu was intricately homemade, light-years ahead of the out-of-the-box crap Ravello tried to con punters with. Hilariously, both are about the same price. 

A white Russian washed my dinner down sumptuously, indicating that there is nothing Bacco does wrong.

The service from Bacco was efficient and the waiters were attentive, topping up my tap water as soon as the level fell slightly below the middle of the glass.

I have nothing but praise for this exceptional restaurant. It’s a tiny bit more than I usually pay for a dinner, but it’s definitely value for money. Check it out.

Grade: A

Restaurant review: CREAMS CAFE (Orpington)

As part of Orpington's attempt to make itself more attractive to property buyers, the town is undergoing something of a revamp. It now has a bright, shiny new Odeon (super-handy for me as I have an Odeon Unlimited card!) as well as a whole array of recently-constructed restaurants and cafés. I decided to give the Creams Café my patronage one Saturday evening, pre-Bad Moms.

I've been to one Creams Café before, in Wembley, and in terms of quality of the dessert, I'd say the north-west and south-east London venues are comparable. You get plenty of bang for your buck at Creams Café - the bubblegum sundae pictured above was only £4.95, and in addition to being delectable, was more than even I could hope for; I wasn't able to finish it all. 

And it's not just bubblegum sundaes they do, there's a wide range of dishes offered on the menu, from waffles to sundaes, with every ice cream flavour you could possibly want. Multiple kinds of chocolate flavours, some with chips in, some without, fruit sorbets, etc. When trying to decide on a dish, I felt, quite literally, like a kid in a candy store.

So purely from a food and monetary point of view, Creams Café certainly suffices. Why anything less than an A-grade rating, then? Well, I'm sorry to report that the quality of the service was just not up to scratch. My friend ordered both mine and her choices, and for her dessert, they brought the wrong order to our table. 

What had happened was that when ordering, she had pointed to her choice on the menu, and the inattentive sales assistant had keyed in another choice. After taking the wrong order away, they insisted on seeing her receipt, which made us very anxious, because they were treating us like criminals for their mistake. They finally made the dessert she had originally ordered, which was 20p more than the dish they charged her for. My friend offered to foot the difference, but the manager said 'don't worry, it's on the house'. 

It's not really 'on the house' when she paid for 97% of it, and had been delayed in receiving it due to the sheer incompetence of the sales staff who couldn't be arsed to listen in the first place, is it? So stop pretending you're doing us a massive favour pal.

Creams Café do a bomb sweet treat. This I'm not refuting. But if you go to the one in Orpington, I'd just warn you keep your eyes open and check that what you ordered is what the teenagers who work there keyed in. They don't seem to have much in the way of Quality Control at this place; you'll have to do it instead.

Grade: B

Restaurant review: RAVELLO (Old Street)

With my Tastecard expiry date approaching on July 12th, I realised how little mileage I'd gotten out of it this year. It just so happened that me and a group of friends were due a catchup, so I thought I'd make use of it whilst I had a chance to at Ravello, a family-run Italian restaurant that was walking distance from where I study in central London.

I had a table booked for the four of us at 6pm, and when I arrived at the restaurant at 6, two things triggered alarm bells. Firstly, the Food Hygiene Score was just a 4. Now, call me pedantic, but I don't think it's too much to ask to demand the perfect 5 from somewhere which will be handling my food. Also, I was the only one there at that time. On a Friday evening. These two elements did not instil me with confidence.

As the evening went on, I realised that my initial doubts about this place were correct. Pictured above is the starter I had. Without Tastecard, it was priced at £7. With the 50% discount, the price is more palatable at £3.50, but I still think that's a bit of a cheek for a few measly pieces of squid. My friends and I had dined at Isolabello Italian restaurant in Holborn a year or so prior to this meal, and three of us had had calamari for starter there. The calamari in Isolabella was far superior to the one here. This crap squid, in tandem with the fact that this was the second time in as many weeks that I'd been cheated on my starter, nearly pushed me over the edge.

Nearly but not quite. That would be the job of the man, sirloin steak marinated in the most suspect-looking tomato sauce I've seen. As you may have noticed, steaks are my go-to dish when I dine out, and I use the quality of the steak as a Litmus test for the overall quality of the restaurant.

Well, this stanky-ass steak, pictured above in all its, erm, glory, is Ravello in a microcosm: lazy, cheap ingredients, poor workmanship and a hurry string something together just to get the punters off the waiters' backs. The tomato sauce in particular was particularly abrasive to my tastebuds; I strongly suspect it consisted of ingredients that were past its sell-by date, because my stomach didn't sit well for the rest of the night post-ingestion.

As the night progressed, more people entered the restaurant, and I can only assume they were members of the restaurant staff's family who dined here out of pity, because they seemed to be regulars and I have no idea why anyone would subject themselves to this awful restaurant more than once. Once the regular punters arrived, any attention we received from the waiters completely evaporated. We had to wave several times to ask for the bill, and a few times more to ask to pay via the card machine. Two clients who arrived asked for the bill after us were allowed to pay before us, a gross inconvenience given one of our group had a train to catch.

Finally, a note on the desserts: graciously, only one of our party of four ordered a dessert, a tiramisu. This tiramisu was promptly taken out of a box from the fridge (behind us, so not even in the kitchen), and we saw her cutting it up and serving it. Talk about shattering the illusion. I understand that not everything in a restaurant will be home-made, even if naturally, we would prefer it to be. But for a RRP of £5.75, you really would be hoping for better than something out of the box. And if it's going to be out of the box, at least have  the good grace to hide your duplicitous and stingy tracks!

Safe to say, it will be a cold day in hell before I set foot in Ravello again.

Grade: F

Review: AMORINO (Islington, Camden Town)

Over the past few months, I've visited Amorino ice cream parlour twice, so thought I'd share some photos, and my thoughts on the experiences.

Trip 1: Islington

£3.50 for three scoops, including mango sorbet, raspberry sorbet and the dulce de leche. All delicious, albeit a bit too fruity for my tasting. Hence, I learnt my lesson and stockpiled my cup with sweeter tastes on...

Trip 2: Camden Town

Four £4.50, you get four scoops! This was much more sweet in flavour, with only lime sorbet acting as the fruit component, and every scoop was absolutely wonderful. If you're going to go here, what I recommend that you know in advance whether you want sweet or fruity, then make sure one scoop in your cup is something else, just to counterbalance the rest of the sweetness, for example.

There were many other enticing flavours which I look forward to trying out. The place was clean and the staff polite. My only foible, and it's a small one, is that for £3.50 and £4.50, respectively, I expected a fraction more, for example, what you get for that amount at Cream's.

Grade: A-

Pub review: The Bull and the Hide (Liverpool Street)

Another LivingSocial deal, another review. I purchased a deal for Sunday roast for two at The Bull and the Hide and thought I’d give my thoughts about the dining experience there:

- Venue: relatively easy to get to from Liverpool Street Station, although be aware that the dining takes place in the upstairs of the pub.
- Ease of LivingSocial use: excellent. In fact, I’d called up previously to arrange usage of the voucher a week previously, but due to over-booking, I had to reschedule for the following week and the staff were extremely helpful and obliging about it, which is more than can be said for many other
LivingSocial/Groupon deals, which operate on a ‘one strike and you’re out’ basis. Furthermore, after the meal was over, the waiters let us go without tacking on an unwanted tip on the bill, which was ace!! As I was lamenting in my review of Tierra Peru, nothing ruins the taste of a good meal more than a barely deserved tip.
- Quality of food: Not the best Sunday roast I’ve had, and not the worst. The meat wasn’t the best, but I loved the potatos and the gravy, but sadly, both were on the sparse side (I adore gravy, had you noticed?). The vegetables were healthy and well-cooked. The choices of dessert were good, but stupidly, I went for the least impressive option, which was a glorified plate of strawberries.
- Quality of wine: I’m not the biggest red wine fan, but I drank it all, which is something.

Overall, it wasn’t the best LivingSocial deal I’ve purchased, but due to the politeness of the staff, the refreshing fact that what we saw was what we got with no extra LivingSocial stipulations, and the cute way they created name-labels on the tables, I’ll be generous and give this place a B.

Grade: B

Meals of the Week.

Lancashire hotpot and greens. £3.30

9/10

Cheese potato skins and banoffee pie. £1.50 + £1.50.

9/10

Pasta and lasagne from the Farmer's Market, Russell Square. £5.

9/10