Written in black and white

This blog is rated 12A for infrequent strong language.

Last week, in preparation for watching Octavia Spencer get her Gone Girl on in Ma, I watched Black or White. The film itself was extremely forgettable, with aspirations of Oscar glory but not enough quality to realise those dreams, but the thing that did stick out about the film, to me, was this line:

The BBFC have stated in previous podcasts that the 'MF word' is considered a 15-rated term. It's why Eat Pray Love, a PG-rated film in every other sense, was 15.

My Seven Favourite Songs from Disney Musicals

I’ve restricted the options to just songs from Disney musicals, as opposed to songs that appeared in Disney non-musicals, such as ‘When She Loved Me’ from Toy Story 2, otherwise it would have made a hard task even harder (I love ‘Le Festin’ from Ratatouille)!

07. Hellfire – The Hunchback of Notre Dame (1996)

A left-field shout, given the crux of this song is about the sexual frustration a pious priest feels towards the beguiling gypsy Esmeralda. But I had to nominate Hellfire because it’s memorable, taboo, and tonally, so recherché (what other Disney film features the line ‘he made the Devil so much stronger than the man’?)

Essentially, the message of Hellfire is ‘if I can’t have her, no-one can’. It’s every possessive ex-boyfriend, immortalised in a Disney song, and fits in neatly with the plot, as dastard Claude Frollo’s unsatisfied urges are his motivation for a Domino effect that leads to Paris burning. The religious imagery employed in Hellfire only go to compound Frollo’s sense of sinful lust for a woman he both despises, yet will do anything to possess.

I like songs which shine a torch onto the hypocrisy of religion, and Hellfire offers an insight to this holier-than-thou priest’s mindset. Turns out, his thoughts aren’t so holy, and the choir-like vocals accompanying Frollo’s disturbing soliloquy underscores this irony nicely.

(On a slight film ratings tangent, the likes of fluffy Frozen and Tangled getting rated PG when The Hunchback of Notre Dame, by far one of their darkest films, was only a U, is mighty misleading. It ought to be at least a 12 for the creepy overtones in this song alone).

06. Prince Ali – Aladdin (1992)

Goodbella.

Retrospective Outfit of the Day from when we celebrated my brother's 18th birthday (back in April) in a Petts Wood restaurant called Cyprianis. The wall art game in this place was strong!

Blue top: Marks and Spencer

Vest top underneath: Miss Selfridge

Glasses: Red or Dead

Film review: SHALLOW GRAVE (Danny Boyle, 1994)

I saw this title at the Prince Charles Cinema as part of their Summer celebrating 35 mm film. In a luxurious cinema with plush velvet curtains, there couldn't be a better way for movie buffs to spend their evening. The schedule runs until August 20th, so make sure you check out the itinerary! 

--

The lesser known of Danny Boyle's Scotland-set 90s collaborations with Ewan McGregor, Shallow Grave tells the story of three housemates, the mischievous duo of a doctor, Juliet (Kerry Fox) and a reporter, Alex (Ewan McGregor), and the more by-the-book accountant David (Christopher Eccleston, as un-Doctor Who'ish as you could possibly imagine). They recruit a fourth housemate who, overnight, is found dead from a drug OD. He also happens to have left behind a suitcase full of money, and the housemates decide to dispose of his body and keep the cash for themselves.

A Kafkaesque nightmare ensues as they find themselves interrogated by probing police, targeted by an unsavoury pair of henchmen who want to know where the money went, and, as a result, the paranoia and distrust between the three escalates. David, in particular, undergoes a character transformation in their precarious circumstances, changing from a meek white collar worker to a ruthless Machiavelli with a penchant for using his hammer.

The tension is wonderfully accentuated by a sparse but effective score from Simon Boswell, with discordant piano keys mirroring the audience's growing sense of discomfort. Yet, at the same time, Shallow Grave also offers levity; when arguing over who should cut up the corps, Alex says to Juliet, 'you're a doctor, you kill people everyday!'.

As the three leads find themselves in increasingly dire straits, the bond between them is stretched thinner and thinner, which potentiates David's magnetic transition from mouse into man. McGregor and Fox are very good, but Eccleston is brilliant, those owl-like eyes peering up from his tortoiseshell glasses throughout, in a sinister, wicked, yet utterly enjoyable morality tale about dishonour among thieves. 

Strong inside but you don’t know it, good little girls they never show it.

Disney princesses – or leading ladies of Disney films in general – all have, without failure, the gift of radiant beauty. From Snow White’s skin so white and lips so red that the Queen feels the need to do her off, Cinderella’s neat blonde hairdo and svelte figure to Ariel’s eye-catching red hair and seashell bra that leaves nothing to the imagination, Disney females have are all without fail, beautiful, no matter what their hair or eye colour, face shape or character. However, in the three that I’ve mentioned are also noticeable character flaws, or even lack of character whatsoever. Snow White is guileless and child-like to a point where she accepts food from strangers The counter argument that she is just a child seems empty if we consider that at the end of the film she goes off with a man much older than her, so either Disney accepts she’s dumb, or they accept they’re basically administering paedophilia to young kids. Either way, they’ve gone wrong somewhere. Cinderella is the epitome of the beleaguered lady who is mistreated by all those around her, but thankfully, she’s pretty, so she catches the eye of the Prince. And being absent minded and losing a shoe? Well, she’s pretty, and she seems to have a remarkable sized food that no-one else in the kingdom has, so that’ll work to her advantage too. As for Ariel, she sacrifices her one gift – her voice, abandons her family and her roots to pursue the man she’s had her eye on. These three women don’t really say much for feminism, truth be told.

Luckily, it isn’t all that way. There are a few Disney females who I was genuinely inspired by, and rooting for throughout, rather than gnashing my teeth at. Here they are:-

Jasmine (Aladdin, 1992)

Being the sultan’s daughter should, in theory, be the sweet life. But not for Jasmine, who feels repressed and cloistered. Whereas previous Disney films had centred around the princess, Jasmine is but a secondary character to Aladdin. But that doesn’t make her inferior in terms of strength of personality, not at all. Standing up to her father and refusing to marry someone she doesn’t love is one thing, but her lack of interest in class or marrying for money is completely inspirational, particularly in this sad day and age, where women will happily plump for a footballer husband who cheats on them as long as they get fancy things. My only lament about Jasmine is that we don’t find out enough about her, and her backstory. For example, she doesn’t seem to have any female friends in the film, and one can’t help but wonder why.

Megara (Hercules, 1997)

From one loner to another. Megara has actually done the whole “giving up her life for a man” thing, quite literally in fact, when she sold her soul to Hades in order to settle a debt her then boyfriend had with him. Sadly for her, he left her as soon as a hotter model came along, leading her tied to the devil, and feeling jaded and disillusioned with men. Meg is by all intents and purposes more of a “woman of the world” compared to other Disney females, but by being older and wiser, she makes for a more relatable and watchable characters.

Armed with a whole arsenal of sarcastic put-downs, it’s no wonder that Hercules becomes so fascinated with her (interestingly, it is he who is the more “feminine” of the two in his innocent ways). And, for all the obvious beauties of Aurora and Cinderella, Meg’s feistiness and sassiness gives her a kind of swagger that makes her, for me, the sexiest Disney character.

Mulan (Mulan, 1998)

Although depicted to be clumsy dolt and constantly speaking without thinking at the start, there’s no denying she has a fierce fire inside her. This fire is unleashed when the Emperor calls for a man from every family to fight for their country. There are no other men in Mulan’s family apart from her dad (she hasn’t a brother), but her father is ill and frail. Despite her protestations, he insists that “it’s my place. It’s time you learnt yours.” Any inferior Disney princess would accept that as a queue to munch into another apple or lie in a bed and sleep until their prince comes, but not for Mulan. Shedding her lustrous locks and donning the less-than-flattering soldier’s uniform, she disguises herself as Ping, her father’s “Son”. At the start she is less-than-convincing, though her ineptitude as a soldier is partially disguised by the blunderings of all those around her. But as time goes by, she cements her place as one of the best and most loyal fighters and catches the eye of the General leading them. Resourceful, brave, and with a never-say-die spirit that many Disney princes could do with, Mulan is a film that makes me proud to be Chinese, and Mulan a character that makes me proud to be a woman.

Tiana (The Princess and the Frog, 2009)

Tiana isn’t actually a princess, only mistaken for one (she is in fact a poor girl working as many jobs as she can, determined to reach her dream of owning a restaurant). And she and Prince Naveen don’t even get off to a good start. Both characters have their flaws; Naveen is a hedonistic, selfish brat and Tiana is the opposite, so hard-working she barely pauses for breath, and in doing so occasionally comes off as judgemental, and has no time for any of that namby pamby “romance” stuff. However, she is also inventive and clever, and it is mainly thanks to her wits that she and Naveen manage to survive so long, never mind at all, as frogs. Both characters grow up and change through the course of the film, and it is this mutual understanding and friendship which builds between them that makes their romance so moving, as opposed to carbon copy “HE SAW HER AND WAS SPELLBINDED BY HER BEAUTY” of the 50s and 60s Disney films.

So that’s me. Who are your favourite Disney gals?

x

42. The Hudsucker Proxy (Coen brothers, 1994.)

43. La fille sur le pont (Patrice LeConte, 1999.)

51. Todo sobre mi madre (Pedro Almodóvar, 1999)

57. Great Expectations (Alfonso Cuarón, 1998).