Sunday, July 15, 2007

Fact or Fallacy?

Have found these things over the Internet, that are posing as the contents page for the Harry Potter book coming out this Saturday. We don't get contents pages in England, but apparently they are present in the US.

So, if you wanna see:
here, here, here and here.

Furthermore, Guardian Unlimited claims to have the opening chapter.

'Chapter One. The Dark Lord Ascending. The two men appeared out of nowhere, a few yards apart in the narrow, moonlit lane. For a second they stood quite still, wands pointing at each other's chests: then, recognising each other, they stowed their wands beneath their cloaks and set off, side by side, in the same direction.

"News?", asked the taller of the two.

"The best," replied Snape



Fact or fallacy? You tell me.

The plot thickens. A little birdie, I'm assuming the same one wrote the first comment in this post, just sent me an e-mail telling me to show you this lot on my blog. Basically, it's what it is trying to pass itself off as is the epilogue of the books. I really don't believe it. But if you wanna humour yourself, read. DISCLAIMER: I did not take these photos. I doubt even the person who sent me the photos took them. I've just been on IMDb and livejournal and all their forums have these photos circulating. So I'm just showing what is already on the Internet.

If not, look away now!!
































I said look away!









































Look away, I said!




































OK, I'm just gonna go ahead and post it. Remember, I'm only posting because I'm so sure that it's nothing but lies, and I felt like showing how not to write a book. If, in the 1% chance that this is how the Harry Potter books end, I shall not be very impressed at all.









Pretty funny, eh?

Keep laughing, with this image. See, they've made Harry look hot! That is how I know that it truly is fake.

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44 comments:

Anonymous said...

I have the last pages of the book. I will send you the photo to show your readers. Maybe then you'll believe that I have inside knowledge.

Emma said...

Um. You have photos?!?!?!?! OK, I'm gonna be slightly more polite now.

Though they could be faked.

Ok, go on, send 'em! Dare ya.

Emma said...

Oh. Um. OK. I got the photos. And I read the epilogue.

...


And laughed my fucking arse off! If that is how JK Rowling chooses to end her 17-year-old saga, then she truly has let herself down.

Well down for trying, but this teenager does have some brains, dear. :p

Katie said...

Emma, I'm in agreement, that is so obviously a fake! You'd think someone who'd go to all that trouble to fake the novel's layout would try and imitate the author's still more convincingly.

Haha, this was a funny post.

t.k said...

lol.

Besty said...

Nice job on the Photoshop, pity how the writing is obviously NOT that of Rowling...

JK Rowling said...

I think the photos are real.

Emma said...

Yes, dear.

Theo Walcott said...

The photos are real! you can trust me, Emma, I wouldn't lie!

Marina Hyde said...

Yeah, that's the real ending. I should know, as I write for The Guardian and you don't, you little bitch.

Shakespeare said...

I read the book whilst I was in Heaven. And that is the final chapter, honestly.

Emma said...

Can I just say, any credibility this source held before (1%), has suddenly disappeared due to all these fake messages.

Although the Marina Hyde one could very well be true, considering that I hate her guts...

Monkey said...

Marina Hyde?

Hi. This is someone who reads The Guardian.

Please stop writing?

Chris Tarrant said...

That is the real ending.

Katie said...

The more "celebrities" post telling us that this is authentic, the less I'm going to take the photos seriously

Mylene Klass said...

Those photos aren't real.

Mika said...

I try to be like Grace Kelly.

Harry W said...

Instead of impersonating celebrities and writing one word answers and throwing insults around, can we address why some believe it is and others believe it isn't?

I personally believe it is a fake, just because I'd think that a high, high profile like TDH would have slightly more security. And if the person who sent Emma the photos has all the photos, why not send the entire book? Why just the ending?

Theo Walcott, Marina Hyde, William Shakespeare, could you answer me that?

Frank Lampard said...

i fink dat the photos r real and dat i am a crap footballer who couldnt hit a cows ars wid a banjo

Emily t said...

I'm going to ignore all the fake celebrities on this thread, and just say that if this was the ending, then I'd march back the store, asking for a refund.

Harry marries Ginny?

Ron marries Hermione?

They realise that Slytherin isn't all evil?

What a load of bollocks!

Anonymous said...

I think the scans and photos are real.

craig said...

@FL

Besty wants to bum you

Katie said...

I don't care if that's not really Lampard and that he can't spell, he can slip me one anyday.

Arjen Robben said...

Emma, you'd listen you what I'd say, I'm your favourite footballer, aren't I?

And I say the photos are real.

Emma said...

OI!!! That was below the belt!!!

Martin, I suspect you.

Emma said...

And no, "Arjen Robben" (read: BestofMyHug), you are not my favourite.

Arjen Robben said...

*cries*

Emma, if you don't take that back, and tell the world that the scans are real (which they are), I'm leaving Chelsea!

Emma said...

OMFG! This is getting out of hand.

I totally agree with what Harry said. Plus, the ending is just too happy and neat for Harry Potter. It just couldn't happen.

If someone wants to argue why it could, I'll be happy to listen.

But the fake celebrity thing is really getting annoying. There's a fake David Beckham on my previous post too.

Arjen Robben said...

Don't say I didn't warn you. I'm leaving Chelsea now.

I hope you can live with yourself, Emma.

Cristiano Ronaldo said...

How many footballers does it take to convince this parvo that the scans are real?

Emma said...

OK, I'm deleting all the unsightly comments!

craig said...

Emma, can you do a blog on the Simpsons in preperation for the film?

Beckles said...

Well... If that's the ending of the book I'll eat my hat. Then I shall most definitely be demanding my money back. I might even use my refund to enrol JK in some creative writing classes, because that sucked! Thanks for the laugh Emma. Now I really can't wait for next weekend :-)

Catherine said...

I'm a wee bit paranoid about spoilers ever since I read some "facts" about the seventh book a few days ago, so I haven't dared click on those scanned pages but judging by the comments, they don't seem to be real.

JK Rowling's uber-protective of her stuff. I wouldn't be surprised if she leaked a fake ending just to distract people. Here's hoping.

Kayleigh said...

Hmm definately a fake but wow they went all the way with the font and layout...shame the person has all the writing skill of a Sun newspaper columnist...JKR would NEVER allow this to happen...but if the real ending is anything like this, ill be leading a mass book burning...
BTW Emma, i want to thank you for leading me to DL the song Samson by Regina Spektor with your top 75 songs..i have it on now and am close to tears, its so beautiful...so thanks...

Anonymous said...

That's about as much the ending of Harry Potter VII as you are humble.

Anonymous said...

Apparently the real copy leaked on the net today... and yeah, that is the ending. Terribly sugary, but they're friggin' kids' books. But the rest of the book is supposedly quite dark, and quite awesome, and MOlly Weasley gets to say "NOT MY DAUGHTER YOU BITCH!!!"

Anonymous said...

i have a picture of every page of the book, and yes this is the true book

Arjen Robben said...

See? I told you I would leave Chelsea if you continued to say the photos were fake.

This proves I'm Robben. And that the photos are real.

Emma said...

With a sharp mind like that, "Robben", I'd thank your lucky stars you pursued your career as an international winger and not a lawyer. :p

Really sad about Robben leaving Chelsea, though, no doubt.

Stace said...

Someone has much to much time on their hands! just crap

Anonymous said...

Sorry everyone, but I think it's obvious by now that that is in fact the real ending. Everything I've seen and read so far has said so.

Emma said...

Ugh, I really have to edit frantically, in case the blog gets found out by teachers.

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