02. Orlando Bloom
In every scene he was in for Lord of the Rings, the trees gave Oscar-worthy performances compared to him. Simply put, there is not a soul on this planet who is as wooden as him. Watching him “act” in the likes of Kingdom of Heaven and Elizabethtown would actually be a laughable experience, if it were not for the fact that he gets paid. And we don’t.
03. Emma Watson
As if the masterful Harry Potter books haven’t been bastardised enough with terrible screenplay and, save third, completely weak direction, the casting directors had give us the little git that is Emma Watson. Her eyebrow acting ruins every scene she’s in, and, now that she’s grown up, she feels to need to throw in arm gestures and a few false tears, making the films now a masterclass in the Art of overacting. Oh dear.
Some actors underact. Well, this talented auteur doesn’t have any facial expressions to underact with. In just about every film I’ve seen him he’s just repeated his lines blandly, and even in Sex & the City, where he was playing a generic husband role, he was impassive as Hell. Hollywood, just stop giving him roles, please. Oh wait, you have.
05. Scarlett Johansson
She slept-walked her way through Lost in Translation, sat around in a trampy way in A Love Song for Bobby Long, overacted in Match Point… I wish this dunce could choose a style, or bugger off, so that our screens don’t have to polluted with her image. More hard work, less sleeping around, please, Slutty Scar.
06. Daniel Radcliffe
07. Sienna Miller
08. Sylvester Stallone
09. Dakota Fanning
10. Rory Culkin
Oh, and people who disagree with this fantastic list can just post theirs. For all members of the “I eat at MacDonalds everyday”, sorry, I mean, Scarlett Johansson fan club don’t waste your time using the “it’s only because you’re jealous” argument. If I’d be jealous of anyone, it’d be the likes of Uma Thurman, Audrey Tautou, or Evangeline Lilly – beauty as well as talent. As it happens, none of these twats have any.